


Male MC Mystic Messenger: OC Works

by Finni_Winter, GhostingOverTheKeys



Series: Male MC Mystic Mesenger [7]
Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, For a Friend, French Kissing, Gift Fic, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, can't write romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-14
Updated: 2018-11-12
Packaged: 2019-08-01 17:38:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 19,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16288925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Finni_Winter/pseuds/Finni_Winter, https://archiveofourown.org/users/GhostingOverTheKeys/pseuds/GhostingOverTheKeys
Summary: These are just fics I write for some of my lovely readers and their own OC's. None of this is canon to my M!MC Mysme stuff. Also! This fic is written in assumption that you know my plot line and OC in Jumin's Route.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Finni_Winter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Finni_Winter/gifts).



> Go check out Frostlesskiss 's OC Eric Hayashi at their tumblr ask-malemc-eric !!! Do it do it! They're super fun and he's super nice! Ciao!

Savior looked down. “It is time that we initiate our plan B.” She tapped her fingers against her throne. “While I do believe in our first fallen angel, I must accept the fact that he may be lost in that sinful world forever. If only we could have gotten to him sooner.” 

“But,” Ray looked over, “he’s been making progress at that place.” 

Savior smiled. “I know, but I fear that those demons may try to coerce him away from us. A second failsafe will help us best.” 

“I see.” 

“It’s time; plant the evidence.” 

“Of course my Savior.” 

**~* 10 pm *~**

_It’s freezing out here and I’m drinking iced coffee. Yeah, I’m real smart. But I guess it doesn’t matter, as long as it tastes good._ Banana Chocolate Coffee. A delectable treat that’s only good if cold. Zack leaned back against the bench he was sitting on and stared up at the stars, or at least what little stars he could see. Being in the city sucked, maybe he was a simple country boy at heart, but sitting under the sky like this was a bit lonely. 

He stood up and looked around. Nope. No one looked like the dude in the profile. Eric Haya… Haya… fuck. Hibachi? Himiko? Oh well, he knew the first name and that’s all that mattered. Seeing as all the RFA members were busy, Zack was tasked to meet the newest member alone. It was Zack’s persistence to force meetings on important things. After his treatment when he joined he didn’t want the same confusion to happen to Eric Hay-… Damn he was hoping that would’ve triggered his remembrance. 

Anyways, now he was nervously drinking coffee and eyeing the bars. No. He refused it. He could do this without liquid luck. That’s fine. It’s fine.Meeting some kind of model? Yup. Suuuupppeer fine. It wasn’t like he ate a whole cup of donut holes on his drive back or anything. And the chips. And the fried pork. 

“Ugh…” He was stressed and now that he was trying to get off alcohol as his depressant he had moved to biting his nails and eating. 

Zack rolled his left wrist and winced. After a little visit to a certain orphanage, Zack managed to walk away with only a few scrapes and spraining his wrist when the railing on the stairs broke and he fell down. No big deal. “Tsk.” He checked his watch. “Hurry up…” He muttered. “How long does-“ 

“Hello!” A heard a cheerful voice. Was that directed towards him? 

Zack looked back. “Oh. Eric Hay… Uhm, Eric right?” 

“Yes Eric Hayashi! And you’re Zachary right?” He wasn’t expecting for him to be so tall and bubbly looking. Zack wasn’t a mean person but he wasn’t used to such… happy people. Even Seven had his moments. The hacker was happy but Zack could see the pain that lied within. With this guy, he couldn’t quite read him. Not yet. Maybe there was something wrong with his own world view, but as a kid he was taught to suspect everyone and to never bother others with your feelings. Not even his friends. 

But still, Eric really was a model. He had the poise and the smile and the fitness. Zack wasn’t necessarily jealous but being near someone like a model, those people who seem so distant and alien from the average person, was nerve wracking. And being hopped on caffeine wasn’t entirely helping either. 

“Yup.” Zack had to look up at him. “Just Zack is fine.” He shook his hand, using his good one. “Please, can we go inside? I’m kinda freezing to death here.” 

“What!? I’m so sorry!” Eric looked panicked. 

“I was kidding, kinda.” Zack walked towards the small cafe and sighed. Warmth. He severely underestimated the weather here. “Thank god.” He took off his jacket and downed his coffee. “Order anything you want, it’s on me.” He brushed his hair back and looked around awkwardly. “Uhm…” He looked through his bag and pulled out his notebook. “Right, I’m not good at this stuff, but I’ll try to answer your questions. But also, let me just first say that you joining is such a relief.” 

“Oh?” 

“Yeah, I’ve been overwhelmed trying to juggle this and… other stuff.” He glanced out the window. “Uhh I guess you might’ve gathered from the chats that I’m sorta dealing with a break-up.” Zack rolled his eyes. “It’s stupid.” _Shut up Zack, stop talking about it. You’re here to greet this guy not bring him down._ “Uh anyways. Your questions?” 

“A break-up isn’t something that you should consider stupid.” Eric gave him a reassuring smile. 

“Y-yeah I guess.” He cleared his throat. “Let me… start over.” He sighed. “Hi, I’m Zachary Rein and I’m 23. I’m currently unemployed and I’m super nervous right now.” He chuckled dryly. “Haha this is why I hate meeting one and one. I ramble.” He slapped his cheeks. “Okay.” He took a deep breath. “Okay. Let’s get started.” 

“Maybe, you’d feel more comfortable if we just… chat?” 

“Uh sure. I guess that could help. I know I haven’t been on the chat like… at all. Sorry about that. I’ve been uh… out of town as of late. I just barely got back last night.” 

“I read that everyone was worried about you. I’m so happy to get to meet you finally.” 

“Don’t be. I’m really nothing special.” He laughed. 

“Don’t sell yourself short!” 

“Sh-short?” 

Eric gasped “I didn’t mean it like that!” 

“How… tall are you?” 

“180.34 centimeters. But being short isn’t bad! Not at all! Don’t worry! I-I’m sorry that-” 

Zack’s lip twitched.“I was just messing with you. A lot of people think I have a height complex but my height has a lot of fun advantages. But… I’m the only one in the whole group who’s short. Even Jaehee is taller than me by 0.00001 centimeters.”

Eric slightly laughed. “Th-that’s not a bad thing.” 

“I hang out with Seven too much. He calls me Chihuahua a lot.” He sighed. 

“Oh! Right! The chat said that you two were _doing things_ together?” 

“ _Doing things_?” Zack chuckled. "I should clarify that we’re helping each other with something. Nothing relationship-y like. Though, currently we’re rooming together.” Zack lowered his gaze. “You’re not living in **that** **apartment** right?” 

“Oh, I go there every now and then to see the emails. But I actually stay somewhere else. Since the apartment is secret and all and I can’t tell my agent and well, that’d be a major recipe for disaster.” 

“Thank god. **Never** stay there. **Never**.” Zack said seriously. “Listen to me Eric, I know I sound weird right now but don’t even think about it. I’ve already told Seven so he’s going to give you access to the emails through your phone and not _that_ computer. Okay? So now you have no reason to stay there. Hell don’t even step foot in there! Just pretend it doesn’t exist.” He leaned back. “Trust me.” 

“U-uh O.K.? But there’s nothing in there.” 

Zack chewed the inside of his cheek. “That’s my fault. Listen, the RFA is a kind place but…” He glanced away. “But there are some doors that should never be opened. I… don’t want to keep secrets from you about the RFA but I made a promise to Seven.” He shook his head. “Hey,” he waved over the waitress, “I’ll have the Irish coffee. Just how much alcohol is in it?” 

“Just a normal amount. We use rum.” She smiled. 

“Okay. I’ll have that.” He showed her his I.D. 

“And you sir?” 

“Oh uhm…” Eric quickly read through the menu. “Is this just all coffee?” 

“They have teas too.” Zack showed him. “And snacks and sandwiches.” 

“Oh! You’re pretty well-versed on the Korean language.” 

Zack shrugged. “It comes from a cousin and a few friends. I was taught young so it stuck. My mom was hoping I’d join the military or do government work since I know three languages. Whoops.” He shrugged. “Didn’t do either.” 

“Uhm…” The waitress just smiled. 

“Oh!” Eric just picked at random. “Uh I’ll have this and this.” 

“Excellent. Okay one Irish coffee and one chai tea with a side of cinabun right?” 

“Yup.” Zack nodded and opened his notebook. “Thanks.” She left. “Thanks for meeting me on such short notice. And so late too.” 

“Ah ha ha…” Eric smiled sheepishly, “Much later than we said. Sorry that was my bad. But I don’t mind at all! The others have been talking about you quite a lot.” 

“Only good things I hope.” 

“Of course! Though Jumin seemed a little agitated. I dunno, that’s just my impression. Oh also, they keep talking about cat paw cakes?” 

“Jumin… Well.” He sighed. “He won’t stop ordering cakes!” Zack gritted his teeth. “My order list is ridiculous because of him! Everyday with the orders. Asking me to personally deliver it! Every. Damn. Day. I have _other_ things to do! And it’s not just Jumin. Seven too!” He shook his head, even though he was grinning like an idiot. “ _Zaaack I want more cakes, if you want me to eat right you have to give me cakes_.” He mimicked Seven’s voice, then he switched to Jumin’s. “ _Zachary, I require more cakes. Just to be sure, I’ll_ ** _order twenty_**.” Zack sighed and returned to his normal monotone voice. “That really happened by the way.” 

“Pfft ahahaha! They must be really good cakes! It makes me want to try one, maybe like this.” Eric showed his paw print tattoos on his hand. 

Zack flinched. “T-t-that mu-mu” he cringed, “must’ve hurt eeergh…” He rubbed his hands together. 

“Oh? Do needles scare you?” 

“Yes. I can’t help but think about them going in the wrong places. Like your eyes or your toes or under your fingernails or your ears! I h-hate needles. The thought of them moving around in you.” He shuddered. 

“Th-that’s pretty vivid… but you know they don’t shove the needle in you right?” 

“But on your hands?” Zack rubbed his hands on his pant legs. “M-my hands are an erogon- I mean they’re sensitive.” He shuddered. “My whole body can’t deal with that kind of pain. They look cool but argh! It’s like thinking about nails on a chalkboard, or shoes rubbing the wrong way on carpet, or feeling your nails scrape against something wrongly, or the feeling of a spoon knocking against your teeth. Or or or!” 

“I! I get it! You’re giving me the heebie jeebies!” Eric shuddered. “I have goosebumps.” 

“Heh sorry.” Zack took a breath. “I guess once I get going I can’t stop.” 

“Your drinks sirs.” 

“Thank you!” 

“Thanks.” Zack sipped his Irish coffee. 

“Do you… really like that stuff?” 

“No. But the buzz is really nice. They have wine here but wine doesn’t mix well with me.” He laughed. “I seem to lose my head and… frankly I don’t want to show you that side of me. Or any of the others. Ugh…” 

Eric raised a brow. “I’m kinda curious now.” 

Zack laughed. “No.” He smirked. “Anyways, I heard from Seven you have piercings. You and needles, you’re braver than me.” 

“I have… a lot.” He smiled. 

Zack eyed him. “How about one on your… you know…” 

“My?…” Zack gave him a look. “Huh?…Ah! N-no! Why go to that conclusion!?” 

Zack laughed. “Start at the extreme and work from there.” He shrugged. “I had once wanted to get piercings on my ears but I’m allergic to the metal.” _Which is why my ring has to be made of a different kind of material._ He drank his coffee a little faster now. The burn of rum was so good. “I think you’re going to be a great addition to the team. Your personality is pretty easy to get used to. Or rather, you’re going to fit right in because you’re really nice.” He smiled. “If anything,” y _ou’re better than I am,_ “it’ll fun working with you.” _Now I can really focus on helping Seven._ “Really it’s such a relief.” 

“I’m happy to help!” 

“But… I don’t want to put too many burdens on you.” _I can’t just dump this stuff on him._ “So just text me when you need help.” 

“About that-“ 

Their phones buzzed. 

“Oh!” 

“Tsk!” 

> V has entered the chatroom
> 
> **V:** Oh, I see our two newest members are here
> 
> **Eric:** Hi V it’s good to see you :D 

Eric glanced at Zack and flinched. He could see the anger in Zack’s eyes as he stared down at his phone. His jaw was clenched tight and the hand he wasn’t using to text with was gripping his glass tightly. 

> **V:** I haven’t seen you in the chat lately, Zachary. 
> 
> **Zack:** I could say the same for you
> 
> **V:** Haha yes;;; I suppose that’s true.  
>  **V:** How are you two doing? 
> 
> **Eric:** We’re actually together right now? 
> 
> **V:** Oh?  
>  **V:** Oh yes, I forgot you wanted to have a meeting  
>  **V:** I’m sorry I couldn’t make it. 

“Tch.” Zack tossed his phone on the table and drank the rest of his coffee. 

> **V:** I do hope you two are having fun. 
> 
> **Eric:** We are thank you!
> 
> **V:** I… was hoping that you would be here Zack  
>  **V:** You still have them right?  
>  **V:** Zack? 

Eric looked up at him. “Uhm… h-he’s asking for you?” 

“Is he? Hm.” Zack sipped his drink nonchalantly. He didn’t even flinch for his phone. 

Eric swallowed and looked around for an excuse.  

> **Eric:** He had to go to the restroom
> 
> **V:** Ah. I see  
>  **V:** I do hope he comes back  
>  **V:** I suppose he doesn’t quite want to talk to me right now  
>  **V:** But despite the frustrations I put on him  
>  **V:** He  
>  **V:** Well it’s nothing.  
>  **V:** I hope that you two are getting along.
> 
> **Eric:** Yeah! We’re having a nice time
> 
> **V:** Good  
>  **V:** I do hope we all get to meet you soon as well  
>  **V:** I actually popped in to talk to Zack but  
>  **V:** Well anyways I had another reason as well  
>  **V:** I just wanted everyone to know that I’m still setting up the date.  
>  **V:** I ask that we all have patience while I try to work this out
> 
> **Eric:** Okay! Thank you!  
>  **Eric:** I’d be very happy to help

Zack glanced at his phone and rolled his eyes. 

> **Zack:** What did you want to know? 
> 
> **V:** Oh  
>  **V:** Well, I wanted to see those files
> 
> **Zack:** Nope
> 
> **V:** I see. I knew you’d say no. But I still had to ask  
>  **V:** But… you’re not doing anything drastic right? 
> 
> **Zack:** Oh? Are you afraid that I’m doing something you don’t like? 
> 
> **V:** Zachary please, I know that you want to uncover the truth but it’s dangerous
> 
> **Zack:** Why? 
> 
> **V:** You know that I can’t say  
>  **V:** Just… are you doing okay in the apartment? I hope you two can share it just fine. Even with Zack living there 

Eric looked up. “But-“ 

Zack put a finger to his lips and smiled. “It’s our secret. Okay?” He winked. “Only Seven, me and now you know.” 

“…Is there… a reason that you’re sneaking around him?” 

“Yes.”  

> **Zack:** Yep we are, mainly because we haven’t ever run into each other. 
> 
> **Eric:** Yeah it works out just fine! 
> 
> **V:** Good. I’m happy everything is working out
> 
> **Zack:** Yeah. Everything is a-okay.  
>  **Zack:** Oh, Eric, we need to get to the station  
>  **Zack:** Sorry V we have to go.  
>  **Zack:** Take care
> 
> **V:** Oh, yes of course  
>  **V:** Goodbye you two
> 
> **Zack:** Bye
> 
> Zack has left the chatroom 
> 
> **Eric** : thank you V! I hope we can talk again! 
> 
> **V** : Yes I do as well. Good night. 

Zack sighed. “What a mood ruiner.” He sipped his coffee. 

“D-did V do something?” 

Zack sighed.“I can’t help it, it’s like as if you saw a person that you can’t stand but everyone else likes them but you’ve seen a side to them that sucks and you just can’t help but be like ugggghhhh and it irritates you when you see them.” 

“Is V really-“ 

“No. He’s nice and considerate but… he does things that really annoy me. He’s hard to hate. Well _hate_ is a strong word. He’s…tsk… he’s just one of those people that I don’t think I could ever fully get along with. Don’t worry about it.” He smiled sheepishly. “I… am making a horrible first impression aren’t I?” 

“No! Not at all!” 

“Don’t be nice.” He smiled. “I understand if you think I’m being unreasonable.” 

“Well you said so yourself that you two kinda have different views on things.” He said reassuringly. 

Zack smiled back. “Well… thanks. But, you were going to say something before? About the party or something?” 

“Oh! Uhm…Well, I think the biggest question I have is how exactly do we recruit members?” 

Zack scoffed. “Your guess is as good as mine. Sometimes being professional doesn’t work. The people we invite are… weird to say the least. Some are animals—don’t ask—, some need you to prove that you’re a worthy place for them, some ask for advice, it’s all just,” Zack rolled his eyes, “ugh maybe I’ve been spoiled by the law firm but these weirdos are so illogical.” 

“Law firm?” 

“I was kinda, sorta, studying to be a lawyer.” He shrugged. “But I was mostly in it for the benefits and the money.” 

“Oh, well I hope you find your passion.” 

“Tell me about your job.” He leaned forward. “What’s the world of models like?” 

“Well it’s a lot of fun but it’s a lot of work too! You do have to maintain your body so you can wear all the clothing.” 

“Well that must be fun. There are a lot of trendy looking people here. Hmm maybe I should try looking into that.” _But I’m lazy in that whole fashion thing._ “ZEN talks about it _all_ the time. I mean, ZEN’s nice but his selfies make me want cry.” 

“Oh! Don’t sell yourself short.” 

“Short.” He lowered his head in defeat. 

“I- I didn’t mea-“ 

“I’m kidding.” He stuck his tongue out playfully and winked. 

“Ah, I’m beginning to think you really _do_ have a height complex.” 

“N-no! I said it has its benefits!” Zack pouted. “Tsk.” 

Eric laughed and downed the rest of his tea. “If you say so.” 

Zack chuckled and opened his mouth to speak. His phone started ringing and his face paled. “Uh… I… I got to take this.” He quickly ran outside and rubbed his neck. “Uh… I… yes?” 

“I got a bill.” Lloyd said deadpan. 

“A-ah w-what bill?” 

“Your tux bill. Look I’ll pay for my tux but not yours.” 

Zack swallowed. “Mmhmm that makes sense. Sorry I didn’t know that they-“ 

“It’s fine. I just wanted you to know cuz they keep calling. You have an address?” 

Zack closed his eyes. He hated this. He hated himself. He was enjoying hearing Lloyd’s voice again. He thought he was getting over him. He thought he was moving on. Guess not. It turned out it was hard to turn away from 18 years of your life. “No. I… uhm you can send it in an email. I’ll call Black Ties and tell them to forward the bills to me.” 

“Okay. Good.” Lloyd sighed in relief. “Wedding stuff, right?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Sure is a pain in the ass.” 

Zack bit his lip. _It…_ “Yeah, hehe.” He rubbed his ring. Oh. That’s right, he left it in the car. 

“Hey, where’s the toothpaste?” Ah… Luka. 

Lloyd’s voice suddenly changed. It sounded… happy. “Oh! I bought some more, it’s under the sink.” 

“Thanks.” 

“Yeah!” He was so happy. That voice was so happy. So damn happy. A happiness he had never heard before. A happiness he could never provide. A happiness that would never be directed towards him. 

Zack gripped his phone tightly. “I… better go call that place.” 

“Huh? Oh.” His voice went back to normal. Even though he now knew that he’d never be the one to make Lloyd that happy, he still liked hearing his voice. If anything, despite everything, that voice was so comforting. Even if that happiness was used behind his back, when he was waiting for Lloyd to come home, he still felt comfort. “Yeah. Sorry about that. I’ll uhm let you go.” 

“Yeah. I love you-… shit. Bye.” His voice cracked. 

“Zac-“ 

He crouched down and pressed his phone to his forehead. “No.” He got up and walked towards the bench. “I was making some progress. I was. I was moving on…” He raised his foot. “…” And kicked the bench. “Ow.” 

“Are you okay!?” Eric ran up to him. 

“Mmhmm.” He breathed in. “Sorry I thought there was a bug on me.” 

“I… uh…” He looked around. “I… accidentally heard some of-“ 

“You were eavesdropping?” Zack glared up at him. 

“No! I swear I wasn’t!” He waved his arms around wildly. “I got a text from my agent that we were going to do a shoot and I wanted to tell you I had to go, but I heard-“ 

“Oh.” Zack sighed. “Okay, sorry. This ‘meeting’ was really pointless. I…” He couldn’t even finish the sentence. He glanced at the bar. “Gonna go home. I’m tired anyways.” 

Eric looked over as well. “Y…yeah. Why don’t I escort you home?” 

“I drove here.” 

“R-right. And I don’t have a car.” 

Zack had to force himself not to roll his eyes, it wasn’t directed at Eric but himself. “I… can drive you.” 

“Okay! Sure! Then we can talk more about the party. Well that is, if you want to.” 

“I offered didn’t I?” He looked at his phone. 

> **Lloyd:** Zack, please don’t beat yourself over that  
>  **Lloyd:** I’m not upset. 

Zack closed his eyes and breathed out. “Let’s go. Did we pay?” 

“I did.” 

“Oh then let-“ 

“It’s okay! Let’s go!” 

“Sure.” 

** ~*  **

The car ride conversation was one-sided. Eric talked quite endlessly but Zack barely even responded or acknowledged anything. He just stared out into the road thinking of times that he shouldn’t think of anymore. Eighteen years, maybe it’s more, but 18 years of friendship and love just gone. How does that happen? And was the majority of it lies? It was so hard to evaluate all that time. How are you supposed to do that? 

“Right?” Eric looked over at him. 

“Huh… oh yeah.” 

The model smiled painfully. “You… okay?” 

“Mmm.” He gripped the wheel tighter. “Sorry, just really tired.” 

“Oh. Okay.” Eric didn’t sound totally convinced, but he knew that right now Zack saw them as acquaintances, if even that. “Oh! That’s the building. Wow. I’m early!” 

Zack just stayed quiet as he drove up to the entrance. “Okay. Have a good night.” He looked at his phone though he wasn’t really looking at anything. 

“Yeah! You too. Uhm…” 

“Oh. Is the door locked?” He pressed the button. 

“Oh no. I just… uhm it was nice meeting you.” 

Zack looked up at him. “Yeah. Same here.” _I can text him back. Maybe I should just to let him know that I didn’t mean anything of it._ “See ya.” 

Eric hesitated slightly, he didn’t know if he should talk to him more or not. But Zack seemed ready to go. He best not push it. “Bye.” He smiled brightly, hoping to just make Zack feel even a little better. But Zack didn’t see it. He was staring out the window rubbing the bottom of his lip lost in thought. 

**~* Next Morning *~**

Zack yawned as he put his repair tools away. He didn’t sleep all night. He couldn’t. No matter how hard he tried he just kept waking up feeling more exhausted then when he dozed off. It annoyed him how much those three simple words had hurt him. It was a mistake, a habit, a simple muscle reaction, but he couldn’t get it out of his head. He sipped his coffee and yawned once more. 

“Did you sleep okay Mr. Rein?” Mrs. Yi spoke to him from the kitchen. He had come to the Yi’s place early, at around 7 am, in oder to clear his mind by doing work. Right now he was taking a break from cleaning the backyard upon Mrs. Yi’s persistence. 

“Yes ma’am.” He smiled. Sleeping in a car wasn’t exactly fun. He could have asked Jumin or ZEN if he could stay over but he didn’t want to impose. Especially since he went out drinking and didn’t stop until 2 am. All around he felt like a huge mess. “Thank you for asking. And I’m happy that,” he yawned again, “ugh sorry, I’m happy to help you guys today.” 

“Oh we were so happy to see you could come over so early. The husband would’ve done all this by himself and I can’t stand it when he pushes himself like that.” 

Zack smiled fondly. “Men, stubborn animals eh?” 

“Exactly.” She laughed. 

Zack turned back and rubbed his forehead, he would need a nap later. At least he could catch some Z’s then. On the bright side, at least he didn’t have a hangover.

“Are you going to make those cakes? You’ve seem to have gotten a lot of orders from your friends lately.” 

“Pshh. Yeah I better. I’ll go wash up and then I’ll get to it. Sorry they keep calling.” 

“Oh don’t worry! We’re making money that way hahaha!” 

Zack chuckled. That was true, he got a cut from the Yi’s since he was the one who made them. He went to the bathroom and washed off the dust and sweat. Last night, while he drank, he texted Lloyd and said he was okay. And throughout the night he just silently drank and allowed himself to remember the past. He didn’t know what was better for him, but he liked remembering. He couldn’t pretend that the past never happened. If he did, he’d lose a huge part of himself and then he would never recover. 

Before he could start thinking of the philosophical world, the door chimed. “Hello.” Mrs. Yi called from the kitchen. 

“Hello!” 

Zack sighed as he exited the bathroom. Well well, if it wasn’t the model. “Ma’am, this is a…friend of mine. Mind if I take over?” 

“Of course.” She went back to prepping. 

“Aye. ¿Qué deseas?” He muttered to himself. “I thought you had a late shoot. Shouldn’t you be sleeping?” 

“Well I had a good night! I thought I’d stop by.” He grinned. _Model’s smile. Dammit._

“Thanks. You have a good shoot?” 

“Yeah! It went smoothly.” 

“That’s good. Here.” He handed him the daily menu. “We only serve muffins and cookies on Sundays.” 

The door opened. “Yo. Morning.” The part-timer. 

“Wow. _You’re_ here early.” Zack said sarcastically. 

Part-timer rolled his eyes. “Don’t be so catty. I don’t work today, I’m here for my paycheck.” 

“Of course you are.” Zack scoffed. 

“Oh! Junhgo!” Mr. Yi walked out. “Here for ya check are ya?” 

“Yessir!” Part-timer, _I don’t care to learn his name,_ smiled brightly. “I hope you had a good day yesterday!” 

_Ugh that fake smile! That guy is such a bastard._

“We did! Although it was too bad that you were sick. We really could’ve used your help.” 

Zack’s jaw clenched. 

“Ah man. I’m sorry.” He pretended to look sympathetic. “I’ll make sure that I take good care of myself.” 

“Please do dear.” Mrs. Yi smiled. 

Part-timer glanced at Zack. He could see Part-timers shoulders shaking, was he trying not to laugh!? 

Mr. Yi shuffled over and handed him his check. “Here you go son.” 

“Thank you!” He grinned. “Okay! I gotta get to class! See ya!” 

“Goodbye dear.” Mrs. Yi waved. The door closed. “Honey, go lay back down. Did you take your pills?” Her voice faded as the two walked to the house portion of the cafe. 

Zack slammed his fist onto the glass display case. “That guy pisses me off.” He was trying to keep his voice steady. 

“Yeah, talk about a poser.” 

“Poser?! That’s being nice. He’s an asshole!” 

Eric shook his head. “And… they just let him act like that?” 

“They’re too nice. ¡Ay, pobrecito!” He said mockingly. “He needs the money because he’s going to college and he lives alone. B fucking S.” He scoffed and went to the kitchen counter. “He just uses them.” 

Eric looked back at the entrance and sighed.“Well, so today is muffins and cookies you said?” 

“Yep.” 

“Hmmm which do you recommend?” 

“Rum or coffee cake muffin. Or this one. Cheesecake muffin, or the snickerdoodle, or this one here, chocolate delight cookie.” He laughed. “Okay, basically the whole menu is good. But this one.” He tapped his pen at the item, Cinabomb. “It’s so delectable. If I had to eat only one thing on this menu for the rest of my life, it’d be the Cinabomb.” 

“Wow! You must really like it. I mean all of these do sound really good. But okay, I’ll try that and what’s the most… mellow item you have?” 

“Mellow?” Zack smirked. “What, you want weed? Sorry but we don’t sell that.” 

“No! I mean, like, something someone sophisticated would eat?” He pulled out his phone. “Something for someone like him?” 

Is that like a brother or something? It was a guy with long black hair. It reminded Zack of Tseng from the Turks in Final Fantasy VII. _I should play that again… nah. Too long._ “Coffee cake or rum cake. Maybe… hmm.” He looked at the rack of muffins. “I’d go with rum cake. It’s sweet but it’s not too sweet. Plus it’s really good. You wanna sample? We have a sampler.” 

“Oh! Really?” Eric smiled and thought to himself, _I think he’s looking better. He seems happier but he also seems a little out of it._ “Can I try that?” 

“Yeah.” He went to the fridge. “Okay here we go.” He held a large tray. “Each one is already labeled so go right ahead.” He peeked into the living room. Oh, Mister and Misses Yi were asleep. He quietly closed the door and turned on the low Studio Ghibli Jazz music that he liked to play in the cafe. “Better.” He sighed. He wanted to sleep too. “You tell me what you want okay? I’ll be here. Making Jumin’s damn orders.” He muttered the last part as he tied on his apron. The fun of it was that he could make any type of cake that he wanted. Jumin ate everything he made him. Seven however was tricky. While Seven pretty much liked all types of flavors Zack had to get creative in sneaking vegetables into the meal. It was literally the only way he could get Seven to eat healthy. “Child.” He smiled to himself. 

“How’s your leg by the way?” 

Zack looked back. “What?” 

“When… you kicked off the bug?” 

“Oh that? Good. It’s fine.” 

“I… well that’s good. I’m happy for you.” 

Zack slightly shook his head. _You don’t need to try and be nice._ “Thanks.” 

“You… you know I was talking with the RFA and they said that… things have been pretty bad for you.” 

“Oh yeah?” 

“I just hope that, I mean I know I’m new, but I don’t mind lending an ear.” 

“There’s nothing to talk about.” He snapped. “…Sorry. Thank you for being nice. I’m just uh… I’m coping and I have it handled. Yes it’s good to talk, but really I’d just be a broken record by this point.” 

“It’s good to vent though.” 

He cut up the vegetables and mixed them into the batter. “Yeah. I agree.” 

“But… I don’t want to push you.” 

“You’re not. Did you choose a flavor yet?” He was feeling impatient now. 

“Oh uh, yeah.” 

Zack wiped his hands on his apron.

“I’ll take the rum cake and the Cinabomb.” 

“You got it.” He packed it up quickly. “Okay, here’s the amount. Have a nice day.” He knocked his sprained wrist against the counter. “Agh…” He winced and turned away. 

“You okay!?” 

“Yep.” He cradled his wrist. “Just had a bit of an accident. No big deal.” 

“You know… they also said that you do… rash things.” 

“Rash things? What, you think that I… Look no. I don’t deliberately hurt myself. I… ugh I don’t want to talk about this. This is from something I was trying to do and I tripped and fell.” 

“But-“ 

“No buts. It’s nothing important. Okay? By rash things they just mean I make bad decisions. Which I do. But I’m not trying to do anything to myself. I’m just… I’m doing fine. Look, thanks for your concern but, like, it’s fine. Why don’t you just focus on yourself okay?” The look of hurt on Eric’s face washed him with regret. “I… I thank you for your concern. I really do. But, you don’t have to force yourself to come check on me.” 

“I’m not forcing! I really do care!” 

“Well,” _I don’t truly believe it,_ “thanks.” He cleared his throat. “Well… I hope you like the cakes.” 

“Thank you. But… please, I’m al-“ 

“Yeah.” Zack turned away and tested his wrist. “Bye.”  

**~* Eric POV: 3 Days Later *~**

I notice that Zack is just a walking contradiction. I happened to run into him when he was wandering around the park doing… well I’m not sure. He was on the phone arguing in Spanish and then he threw something into the park lake. I think it might’ve been a rock. I was with my agent so I really couldn’t do much but… it really bothered me. When I managed to slip away for a break I ran up to him. He says he doesn’t want to talk but I can tell that he does. His face just tells me that he really wishes to speak his troubles but something is holding him back. 

So first he says he doesn’t want to talk but he does. Then he says that he’s fine yet, according to Seven, he was out of commission yesterday because he got hungover. I just don’t get it. He can be really nice but at the same time really off-putting. He’s been snapping at people more and more lately too. Whenever someone mentions something about how he’s doing he’s curt, and if they keep on asking he gets snippy. Maybe he’s getting annoyed but still. I just don’t understand. Everyone in the RFA is opening themselves up to him yet he won’t say anything. I heard him mutter something about ‘giving a right’ but I don’t know what that means. 

It’s too bad, when he’s nice he’s really nice, but just after being nice I guess something happens to sour his mood. I tried to get Seven to tell me but all he said was that family is a strange thing. So… familial issues on top of his break-up. I had to know more by that point. And so, I had turned to Yoosung. And that’s when I learned. Poor guy, being cheated on is awful. But on top of that,   

> **Yoosung** **☆** **:** That’s not all  
>  **Yoosung** **☆** **:** I feel so bad for him  
>  **Yoosung** **☆** **:** It was apparently like a few days before his wedding too
> 
> **Eric:** What?!  
>  **Eric:** He was about to get married and he found out about that!? 
> 
> **Yoosung** **☆** **:** Yeah. I guess he came here to sort of get away from things  
>  **Yoosung** **☆** **:** He…  
>  **Yoosung** **☆** **:** I dunno. I’d be pretty upset too. 

No wonder he snaps so much. I know that he wants to be alone… but I won’t allow it. I won’t push him but he needs to know that someone is there for him cheering him on. Right? That’s what motivates you! 

And so, here I am, at Pure Joy sitting with cake samples again. Except, this time Zack isn’t on the floor today. The old couple here has him working on the roof. I haven’t seen him yet but luckily today is my day off, so I can wait. And while I’m waiting… 

“Junhgo, please get the cookies out of the oven for me.” Mrs. Yi called over to him as she wiped the tables. 

That’s the part-timer. I don’t get it. He doesn’t do anything at all. I watch as Junhgo rolls his eyes and goes to the oven. Man, he really irritates me, they really should just let him go. He doesn’t care about his work. At all. I mean, I understand it’s hard getting motivated or getting the energy to do your work but… these guys rely on him. They’re nice and they barely ask much out of him. I don’t like it. 

The door jingled and Zack walked in wiping the sweat off his neck. “Okay.” He glances my way and gives a bit of a smile. I think he does that out of habit, but to me, he’s also genuine about it. “I fixed the leak.” 

“Oh thank you Zack!” Mrs. Yi walks over to him. “You really are handy.” 

“It was just a small fix, no big deal.” 

I don’t believe that, he looks beat. Plus he was up there with the sun blazing on him. It’s hotter than normal today. He pulls the collar of his tank and fans himself with it. Mrs. Yi hands him a cup of water with orange slices in it. He mutters a thanks and sits away from me. 

“How’s it going Mister Model?” 

“Oh! It’s going pretty good. You?” 

Zack just nods as he downs the drink. Now that I can see his arms, I notice a little discoloring, like bruises maybe? I guess that’s normal when you’re an all around repair man. “That’s good! We haven’t seen you in the chat all day.” 

Zack raised a brow. “Well… I’m working.” 

“I know, I just mean, everyone likes to say hi.” 

Zack chortles. “Yeah. I should pop in soon.” He’s thinking something. I can always tell because his face is such an open book; he always looks away and his mouth twitches and his hands move in the gesture he’s thinking of. Also, I’ve caught him muttering to himself a lot, though it’s in Spanish so no one understands him. He’s not as quiet as he thinks he is.

“Yeah! Yoosung said he wants to play LOLOL with you again.” 

“Ha! I suck at that game. I was really dragging him down.” He glances at the part-timer and slightly narrows his eyes. I look over too, he’s just texting as he lets the cookies cool. “Maybe I will tomorrow.” He brings his gaze back to me.

His gaze is really piercing, it’s like he’s staring into my soul when he talks, but he does dart his eyes away a lot. But when he’s talking about something he likes or is comfortable with, like when he went on about his own heebie jeebies, he stares right at you and I feel like he’s reading my every thought. Well, he did say he worked at a law firm. Maybe that’s the way they are. He said in the chat once that he had a resting bitch face but… he really doesn’t. He just always looks tired, I don’t blame him. 

Zack leans back into the chair and rolls a ring on his ring finger. 

Oh. 

I think I know what that is. 

“Well, what are you ordering today?” He eyes the sampler plate. 

“Oh! Well, just something to get the staff as thank you for the photo-shoot.” _That’s pretty much true but I’m also here to try and talk to him._

“That’s nice.” He gives a small smile. He’s such a serious person. He reminds me of my agent a little bit. Just a little. Zack goes on little rants every now and then. He’s about to say something when his phone pings. Oh, please don’t let that be something that’ll bum him out. 

Just. 

The. 

Opposite. 

“Gyaaaaaa!!!” He shoots up, I nearly fall out of my chair. Even part-timer jumps and nearly drops his phone. “Oh. My. God!” He holds his phone likes it’s a holy grail. “Yes! YES!!! It’s FINALLY! HERE!” 

“W-what?” Part-timer holds a hand to his chest to catch his breath. 

“Yes!!!” He dials his phone. “…. DID YOU SEE!?” He’s speaking in pure english now. “It’s out! What?… NO WAY! REALLY!?… Ugh I hate you. I want it so badly. All the Persona characters in one game? I really _really_ can’t wait! Yeah!… Yeah it’s being sent! Mmm-hmm! Right! Okay, yeah get some sleep…. right I know right!? GAHAHAHA!” 

_What the heck was that laugh?!_

“Okay! Bye!” 

Part-timer scrunches his face. “Uh what the heck?” 

“Sorry. No big deal.” He couldn’t hide his giddiness. What a sudden change. Actually… is _that_ the real Zack??? This suddenly happy and bubbly person? “Uh!” He coughs. “I’ll just be outside.” 

“No no no.” Part-timer walks up to him. Wow, even this young guy is taller than Zack. Who was it that Seven said Zack looked like? Mi…Mishima Yuuki from a game called Persona 5. Didn’t Zack just say the word Persona? I need to look up who that is. “You just did something interesting. Tell me what’s got you all excited?” 

Zack just rolls his eyes, that’s his favorite move, and chuckles. “Just nerd stuff.” 

“What? That’s it? You got that excited over a _game_?” 

He just grins at him. 

“What game is it?” I ask. 

Zack’s face lights up more. “Persona Q2.” His eyes sparkle. 

“What?” Part-timers face drops. "PQ2? Tch you know it’s just gonna be another dungeon crawler. And plus, all those characters are going to be hell to manage.” 

“And you said who’s a nerd?” Zack smiles wryly. 

“A-ah I didn’t mean it like that.” He blushes. “It’s just something I heard.” 

“Who’s your best girl?” 

“What?” 

“Mine’s Haru.” 

“What!? Haru!? It’s clearly Makoto!” Part-timer scoffs. 

Wow. Zack seriously looks so different. It’s like he’s just transformed into a whole other person. It’s actually kind of refreshing. 

“My dream team in PQ was Yuu, Minato, Naoto, Junpei, and Yusuke.” 

“What? Pfft. Like, why didn’t you use Zen?” 

“I had awesome personas. That’s why.” He laughed, almost boyishly. 

The two were so into their conversation that they didn’t even see a customer walk in. “Ummm.” I get their attention. 

“Welcome.” Zack and Part-timer say at the same time. Zack grabs his things and heads inside the house to clean up. 

After Part-timer deals with the customer he sighs. “Wow… never have seen him like that before.” 

“You guys don’t normally talk?” I ask. 

“Nope. Never had a reason to. We just make snide remarks to each other. Honestly I thought he was really annoying. He acts so high and mighty all the time. That, and he gets all moody. It’s like geez, leave that at home.” He shrugs. “I guess, he’s kinda cool. Maybe.” 

Heh… okay then. 

After a few minutes Zack comes out wearing some nice streetwear. When we met he was in a hoodie and jeans, and he was like that too at the park. But now he comes walking out in red and black buffalo plaid, a black beanie, and dark black jeans, he’s even wearing nice black hiking boots. We’d call that ‘skater’ look in the business. 

“Tsk,” Part-timer eyes him, “seems like someone is in a good mood.” 

“Yep.” He smiled. 

“You got a date or something. You normally dress like a slob.” 

Zack scoffs. “Nothing like that.” He grins. “Hey, Model Man, wanna go out?” 

“W-what?” 

“Wanna go out?” He leans forward and grins. “Hmm~” Whoa! Complete 180! Is that charm I sense? Part-timer scoffs and goes back to texting. 

“Sure!” 

“Great. You drink?” 

“U-uh,” I thought he had a drinking problem, I better say no, “not today I can’t.” 

“Mmkay I know a place then.” 

** ~*  **

Well, he’s drinking anyway. He just chose a place where I can get some food. Actually, speaking of food, I never did buy those cakes for the staff. I guess I’ll go do that tomorrow now. 

“Ah!” Zack pulls the beer mug away from his lips. “That’s the good stuff!” 

“I’m happy you’re so happy.” 

“Happy~ happy~!” He sing-songs. “I’m so happy that you’re so happy that you’re happy I’m so happy!” 

Pfft what? Wait. Is he drunk already? 

“Nope! I’m not drunk!” He laughs. Did he just read my mind?! “I haven’t felt this good in so long!” 

That game must’ve really brighten his spirits. “I can’t believe that part-timer was so chatty.” 

“Uh huh me too! Seven doesn’t have time to talk about that stuff most of the time and Yoosung is really into MMO’s so… you know. It was fun to talk with a fellow fan. I normally don’t do that, just fangasm, I mean fangirl with my friends. I called my friend once I got the notification.” He laughed. “She’s pregnant so she’s up most of the night. Ahaha! I can’t wait!” He downed his beer and munched on the fries he ordered. “When P5 came out, finally, I nearly died. Oooo! So much fun. Love love love it!” He shook his knee in giddiness. 

“Wow! You really love this series.” 

“This series, Danganronpa, Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, et cetera and et cetera.” He looked out fondly. “Ah man, games were my best friend back when I was a kid.” He leaned his arms on the table and stared straight at me. No matter how happy, those eyes still pierce my soul. “I know I’m getting just a bit too old for it, but I can’t help it. Friends? What friends? I gotta level up!” He laughed again. “Mmhmm~” 

“Heh, was it hard to concentrate on school when you had all those games?” 

“School? No. I was a straight A student. I graduated top of my class.” 

“O-oh.” 

“School, or learning in general, is pretty much the only thing I’m good at. School is the only thing I’m competitive at. Jumin told me his top score and it makes me want to go back just to beat him!”

He… REALLY loves school. Man… “Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah! But I’ve accepted the fact that Seven is way smarter than me. Even if it makes me want to CRUSH him in a trivia competition.” 

“You… really love school huh?” 

“Nope! I hate being graded. But I love being superior to everyone!” He admitted freely. “At least academically! Hmm I also love being praised for my efforts. Hmmm isn’t there a kink for that? Mmm best not look into that.” 

“You sure you’re not drunk?” 

“Buzzed! Oh. Does that kind of talk embarrass you? Sorry hehe! I took a class in all things about sex so I really don’t care about talking about it.” 

“W-what why?” 

“Because I wanted to know. That’s why. I learned a lot. And also I was figuring things out for myself and I wanted all the information for me and my hus- my ex.” His smile only slightly faded. “Haha I got to stop saying that.” 

“Well… I… heard-“ 

“Heard about it from the others? Yeah no doubt.” 

“I’m sorry that it happened.” 

“Me too!” He laughed bitterly. 

Uh oh.I think he’s slipping. But… talking about it is good. Right? 

“That fucker Luka stole my husband. But then I guess it’s whatever because my husband didn’t love me at all!” 

Wh-what? “What… do you mean?” 

“Mmm nothing. Another beer please!” He cheered. 

“Well… I… I mean at least…” I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t even know what words I should say, all of them sound so contrived and fake. 

“Yeah.” He smiled. “Look, let’s just not talk about it. Okay? I’m in a good mood and I don’t want _them_ to ruin it. But, I don’t blame _them._ Mmm well that’s a wrong way of putting it. Ugh. I dunno. It’s the worst feeling ever to be betrayed and then you’re forced to pick up the slack and the pieces. Bills and loneliness. It sucks. Eighteen years I gave him and for what?” 

Eighteen!? Well, he’s talking. I hope it’s good for him. I said I’ll listen and so I’ll listen. “That… is a long time.” I just want to be careful in what I say. 

“It is right? Tch. I don’t even know what to think half the time. It’s like I lost a second part of myself. I prided myself in being an independent person but it looks like I was wrong.” 

“Well, 18 years is a long time, like you said. People become a big part of your life in that span of time.” 

“Hmph. I shouldn’t kid myself I guess. He was extremely important to me. He… damn. I really really **really** thought I’d be safe with him for the rest of my life.” 

“Safe?” 

“…Heh.” He looked away. “No. It’s nothing.” He laughed bitterly once more and munched angrily on his food. “Gahhh that totally sobered me up.” 

I know he’s not happy about that but I think that’s a good thing. “Well, we better order our main course meals.” 

“Hmph.” He slammed his hands on the table. I nearly spat out my drink. “I gotta watch the trailer again when I get home. Oh that’s right. I need to order for Seven too. Mmm lemme see.” He eyes the menu. 

“You know… Zack, I think you’re doing… you’re a nice person.” 

“Uh… thanks? You too.” 

“I’m not fishing.” Eric smiled. “I just… I’m sorry that you-“ 

“It happens. No big deal.” 

“But… it is a big deal.” 

“Nah, no biggy. It happens to a lot of people. Everyone recovers from this so I just gotta suck it up.” 

Just… suck it up? But… it’s not like he made a little mistake, he was cheated on! “So what?” 

“…” 

“Just because it happens to others doesn’t make your problem insignificant. You have feelings too.” 

“…” He called the waitress over. “Um I’ll have these burgers to go.” 

“Z-Zack?” 

“Just give me the ticket at the counter.” He smiles. 

He’s running away. 

“Zack wait! It’s okay to talk about-“ He’s getting up and leaving! “It’s okay!” I grab his wrist. “Your problem isn’t insignificant!” 

Zack looks back at me and opens his mouth to speak. But he says nothing. Against the light of the restaurant I could swear I saw tears in his eyes. Before I could do anything he breaks aways and smiles. “Thanks. I gotta go.” 

What… is he going to do? “But Zack!” 

“I got to get the food to Seven hehe!” He says backing up, then he runs out the door. 

Why… Why would he think getting cheated on wouldn’t be a big deal? Normally people would be livid and want revenge on the person who wronged them. I… just don’t get it. Why tell yourself that it’s okay? That… doesn’t sound right. 

No! I can’t just stand around gawking. I gotta find him! 

** ~*  **

There! He’s in his car. Is… he… what is he doing? His hand is shaking. I watch as he opens his hand and I see a little glimpse of blood. I rush over immediately. “Open up!” 

He jumps and bangs his knees on the wheel and curses. “What?” 

“Open the door!” I snap. 

He sighs and rolls down the window. “What?” 

“Why’s there blood?” 

“What?” He looks at his palms. Oh, he must’ve dug his nails into this palm hard enough to draw blood. “Oh. Huh. Well it’s nothing. Just leave me alone.” 

“You shouldn’t-“ 

“Eric.” He looks at me darkly. That’s… another face I’ve never seen before. “Leave. Me. Alone.” 

“You… you shouldn’t push people away!” 

“I’m not! I just don’t want to talk!” 

“You are! We all know that your situation is serious and it’s sad.” 

“Tch! It can happen to anyone! Who cares?! I’m dealing with it! You guys should focus on yourselves and have fun! I’m not going to be the one to ruin that.” He shook his head. “You know what? Give them this.” He shoved Eric money. “This is stupid.” And before I could do anything he drove off. 

What… Zack? Why? 

**~* 8 hour drive later: Zack *~**

“You’re back!” Seven smiled up at him from his desk chair. “Ooo what’s that smell?” 

“Burgers and fries. I went to a local place on my drive here.” Zack smiled at him. 

“Niiiiceee.” Seven looked up at him. “Hmm what’s up? Why are your eyes all puffy?” 

“Allergies.” He laughed. 

Seven just smiled. “Yeah. Those are the worst.” He hugged him. “Welcome back.” 

“Heh, thanks? Why you being so loving all of a sudden? Were you lonely?” 

“Heh, maaaaybee.” He looked at the chat on his computer. “Newbie is askin’ for ya.” 

“… I’m home safe. I’m really hungry, let’s eat.” 

“Okie!” 

_I don’t know what to do with my life. I don’t even know if I have a life to call my own anymore. But… I’ll just keep at this. And… maybe I should talk, maybe I should let myself express how angry I am but…_

_Who gave me the right?_

 

 


	2. Finding Love Takes Courage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based off of Frostlesskiss's male MC Eric Hayashi. Check out their tumblr ask-malemc-eric!

**~* Six Months into Being Members of the RFA *~**

“What…” Zack arched his brow. “Shit sorry, I wasn’t listening at all.” 

Eric smiled. “It’s okay, I was just saying that we found a ballroom.” 

“Right…” He sighed. “Right cool. I just…” He huffed behind his hand. “Can I vent to you?” 

Eric grinned. _Finally_ , he thought, _he’s opening up to me. It nearly took five months for it to happen._ “Of cour-“ 

“I was working with my ex and a few old co-workers for something, it doesn’t matter what, and I worked my ass off on it…” He looked out the window and clicked his tongue. “Damn I was really proud of it.” He said it mostly to himself. “Then I sent a text to the group to get a status update and one of them was like ‘what you did was wrong, it was the wrong format so I went ahead and re-did it, sorry.’ And I looked over what I did and it’s like… no? I didn’t do it wrong. And I’m waiting for him to email me his changes and it’s just like…” He ran his fingers through his curly hair. "I know I _look_ unapproachable but… I mean I know the time you’ve known me I’ve been difficult but back then I wasn’t.” He rubbed his fingers into his hair. “God… now all that I worked on is just shoved aside. And I have to present something via Skype and I did all my research and now I’m wondering what the hell am I presenting? I’m just… God I spent _hours_ working on it, I sacrificed other things I wanted to do so I could do it. Like, for instance, doing this new party. Dammit.” He shook his head. “I’m pissed.” 

“So… they just superseded your work?” 

“Essentially. Because I _did it wrong._ ” He threw in air quotes. _“_ Bull shit. I’ve done this before, I followed the directions. I know I suck at following directions in general but when it comes to shit like this I pay attention.” He let out a loud sigh. “Son of a bitch.” He mumbled. “Forget it. Let’s just order.” 

“We already did.” Eric chuckled. 

Zack sighed. “God you’re right. I’m just so…gah!” He laid his head on the table and covered his head with his arms. “Damn…” He let out a loud huff and shook his head. 

“You should talk with them.” 

“I’m planning on it once I get the email. The presentation I need to do is on Monday. It’s just, uhm, too late for me to do anything. I had spent so much time editing and lining up the work and doing…” he leaned up and clapped his hands together. “You know what? Dead horse.” 

“It’s not a dead horse. You’re annoyed and it’s justified.” He took a sip of his tea. “You’re sure you did it right?” 

“I’m really sure. I asked Jaehee and she said it was right. I even coerced Jumin with cat treats and his own cake for him to look at it and he kind of liked it. I mean he said something akin to ‘amatuer-ish’ and that sort of… well whatever, he said it was good.” He smiled faintly at the memory of that day. “Pfft.” He caught himself before he started laughing. “Ahem, yeah I did it right.” 

“You’re right. Even if it was wrong they should’ve told you right away and worked with you.” 

“That’s what I’m saying.” He laughed bitterly. “And I agree, if I did it wrong I did it wrong. I mean texting exists for a reason. If I’m busy I’ll respond later it’s not like there’s no earthly way of contacting me. It’s not like you need to contact me via carrier pigeon.” 

Eric nodded and chuckled. After a beat of silence he slightly leaned forward. “Hey… I’ve been wondering for awhile now, do you _like_ Jumin?” 

“Wh…no.” He looked away. “He’s nice and he centers me but he’s just a friend.”

“Have you started crushing on anyone?” 

Zack sipped his drink faster. “Yeah.” He shrugged.

“That’s good! You should start enjoying a little crush.” 

“Y-yeah.” He started to turn a little pink. 

“I’m happy for you.” Eric clapped his hands together. 

“Yep.” He nodded without making eye contact. “Anyways, I’m done talking about my problems and all that. What was it you were saying? A ballroom?” 

“You sure? I really don’t mind.” Eric looked at him with kind eyes. He wanted to let Zack to keep going, considering how everything _had_ been with him, he didn’t mind if Zack ranted. 

“Yep.” He picked up the liquor menu. “I think I’ll drink.”

“B…But Zack.” 

“Tsk.” He rubbed the back of his neck again. “I’ll be good. Promise.”

~*~ 

He kept his promise. Only slightly buzzed, Zack went over the costs and typed into his laptop. Now that he was focusing on doing RFA work he was back in the zone, though occasionally he would smile and bite the bottom of his lip to suppress his giddiness. He mumbled to himself and alternated between chewing on his pen, drinking his beer, and snacking on his fries as he listened to his music. 

After a good hour Zack sat straight up and gripped his arms. “Oh damn.” He slightly shuddered and squeezed his hand into a fist. 

Eric looked up from his own paperwork. “Hmm? Something wrong?” 

Zack turned beet red. “Nope. Nothing.” 

“Liar.” Eric chuckled. “What’s wrong? You cold?” 

“Nothing.” He took off his headphones. 

Ah. “Suuure. Lemme guess, someone with a sexy voice was getting you all hot and-“ 

Zack shot him a look. “Shut up.” His voice came out quieter as he felt a tingle run down his spine. “It’s as you said. I was cold.” 

“That’s why you’re beet red? Hmm interesting.” Nothing wrong with a bit of teasing right? 

Zack’s jaw clenched. “I! I am not. It’s just hot in here!” 

“You said you were cold.” 

“Well maybe I’m coming down with something.” He huffed. 

“What was it? Knowing you, someone was whispering into your ear.” 

His fingers twitched as he babbled a retort. 

“B-I-N-G-O~” Eric gave him a triumphant grin. “Don’t think I didn’t notice how red you got when Jumin whispered into your ear at the last party. Hahaha! You’ve got it bad.” 

Zack swallowed. He felt his blush spread up to his ears and down his neck. “I-It just tickled! I’m sensi-“ 

“And then I did it and your jaw clenched. Like it always does when you get-“ 

“W-well now. It ooks like we’ve got a detective on our hands. What else have you been noticing Sherlock?” He said sharply with a snarky smirk. 

Eric smiled gently. “I’m not trying to attack you here. I’m just teasing.” 

Zack looked down. “Y-yes I know that!” He said too quickly. “I-I’m just embarrassed.” 

“So~ Who was it hmm~” 

“No one!” 

“Jumin voice message? Seven voicemail?” 

“Nothing!” 

Eric got on his elbows and looked at his computer. 

> **“Exclusive Interview With New and Upcoming Mod”**

Zack closed his laptop, he was a new crimson shade of red. He felt like he was going to melt. “S-stop.” He mumbled. 

Eric looked up at him and frowned. “I’m sorry I took it too fa-“ 

“You didn’t.” He smiled weakly. “Ehm… I got to… I’ll be back.” He grabbed his phone and quickly retreated to the bathroom. 

~*~ 

Zack washed his face and took a breath. “God.” His phone buzzed. 

> **Lloyd:** I didn’t know he had done that.   
>  **Lloyd:** Tsk, that just sucks. I saw your rough draft and I liked it
> 
> **You:** Thanks.

He smiled and leaned against the sink. It was a single stall restroom so he had the place to himself for a bit. 

> **Lloyd:** They didn’t even tell me. I’m on this project too
> 
> **You:** Geez, I’ll tell them to email you
> 
> **Lloyd** : Well, enough of that, how’ve you been? 
> 
> **You:** I’m doing good. Changing, metamorphosing, blah blah 
> 
> **Lloyd:** Lolol wow, look at you.   
>  **Lloyd:** Didya listen to that song I sent you? 
> 
> **You:** Sure did. You still have good taste
> 
> **Lloyd:** Right? Me and Luka are gonna see them in concert soon. Hahaha it’s a little anniversary thing. He’s literally the best

Zack’s heart took a giant nosedive off a cliff. He couldn’t feel his fingers as he typed

> **Lloyd:** Shit  
>  **Lloyd:** I’m so fucking stupid. I’m so sorry
> 
> **You:** That’s awesome! Concerts always feel so rare in our town
> 
> **Lloyd:** Zack
> 
> **You:** Send me some pics of the concert so I can see what it’s like. I like this place but I haven’t found bands here that I want to see
> 
> **Lloyd:** Zack I’m so sorry. I wasn’t thinking I just

“Fuckin’ drop it.” He mumbled. “Can’t you see I’m trying to just…” 

> **You:** Hannah’s going to a concert. The Wiggles 
> 
> **Lloyd:** Yeah  
>  **Lloyd:** Oh haha yeah? 

It felt awkward now. 

> **You:** Leanne loves them. I thought they went extinct 
> 
> **Lloyd:** Lol you mean that they retired? 
> 
> **You:** heh yeah that. 

He leaned his head back. _Anniversary huh… g-good for…_ _ahem_ _good for the…_ He closed his eyes and forced himself to say it out loud. “I’m…h-happy for them.” It came out to strained. 

> **You:** well I’m out with friends so I better got off the phone. Just wanted to give you a heads up. 
> 
> **Lloyd:** Oh? You’re going out?   
>  **Lloyd** : Heh that’s surprising. Nice, I’m happy for you 

_Don’t patronize me._

> **Lloyd:** & thx for the heads up. That would’ve been disastrous
> 
> **You:** No problem. 

He sighed and shook his head in irritation before heading back to the table. The moment Zack sat back down he slipped on his headphones and opened his laptop. 

“You doing okay?” 

“Peachy.” He smiled kindly. “Just a bit sleepy from the beer.” Soft clicking keys filled the room. 

“Do you…want to go home?” 

“No I’m fine.” He waved his hand dismissively. _I can’t be alone right now._ “I’m going back to work.” 

“…Sure.” Eric kneaded his brows. _What happened? He looks a little pale._

~*~ 

“Well,” Zack stretched his back as he put on his sweater, “we really made a lot of headway with the party. Fall themed is going to be really nice. I’ll make sure to hire help for the pies and treats. The caterer Jaehee-“ 

“Uh Zack.” 

“What?” He didn’t look up as he put his laptop in his bag. 

“Can we hang back a bit? I see some paparazzi and I don’t want to get pulled aside.” 

Zack suppressed an eye roll. Since hanging out with either Eric, ZEN, or Jumin he had gotten a taste of the high life. Frankly he hated the hell out of it. “Look who’s getting famous.” He sat back down. “Sure. No problem.” 

“Next week I have this photoshoot with my rival and it’s been getting a lot of good press.” 

“Oh… yeah that guy Ginger Tea right? Sounds like a stripper name.” 

“Heheh well… uh you see I have to do the photoshoot, right. There’s a new perfume line coming out called Savage and Fierce.” 

“Of course there is.” He scoffed. 

“And the model who does a better shoot will get featured in magazines and television commercials and on billboards.” 

“That _is_ big.” Zack raised his brows. 

“My manager will be there but this is a really big deal for me. I was hoping to have some…support.” 

“Why you sayin’ it like that esé?” Zack shoved a lollipop in his mouth. “Is there a problem or something?” 

“Uh well, no. I just wanted to see if you wanted to go.” 

He rolled the lollipop around his tongue. “Yeah sure. What day?” 

“It’s in two days.” 

“Cool.” He slid his phone over as he sucked hard on the sucker to keep himself from salivating too much. “Here put it in my schedule.” 

Eric coughed into his hand and typed out the event slowly. “Okay, there.” 

“Good. Thanks. This’ll be fun. I’ve never been to a photoshoot before.” He grinned. “I’m a little excited.” He looked out the window and pressed the blunt end of the sucker against his lips. “I think they’re gone. I need to get home soon. I got some damage control to take care of.” He rolled his eyes. “See if that idiot emailed me yet.” He scoffed. 

“Yeah. I’ll see you soon! I’m so excited!” 

“Aidios.” Zack smiled. 

**~* Two Days Later *~**

Zack looks like shit. That’s the first thing Eric thought as he saw him coming down the street. He had dark circles under his eyes and looked a little sluggish. Eric walked up to him and pinched his cheek. “What’s with the circles?” 

“Rough night.” He chuckled.

“How’d Monday go? We were getting worried, you wouldn’t answer our calls.” 

“It went. It’s over. I did my job.” He yawned. 

“You didn’t even come on yesterday.” Eric put an arm around his shoulder and grinned. To anyone passing by it looked like he was holding him like a partner what with the height differences. 

“Had some thinkin’ to do.” He yawned. “I’m ready for this though. Look.” He held up a little paper flag that said Go Eric Go! “I made it.” 

What was this? Was this real Zack again? Not the angry depressed one? Eric grinned and pinched Zack’s cheek again. “How cute! I love it!” 

“Yeah? Cool.” He leaned into him, a little pink in the ears. “Tired. It’s warm.” He closed his eyes and hummed. His eyes grew wide as he let out a startled gasp and flinched away. “L-Let’s go.” With a loud huff he suddenly picked up the pace and practically ran towards the bus stop. 

**~* 20 Minutes Later *~**

This odd behavior didn’t subside. Zack was more cautious around him as they walked around. He seemed extremely self-aware of the space between them and was more jumpy whenever they bumped together on the street or bus. What was going on? Perhaps it was the lack of sleep? 

Once they got to the photoshoot Zack was practically exhausted and collapsed on the folding chair. “Ahhh, what a walk.” He yawned. “You should’ve told me, I would’ve driven us.” 

“Oh right! I forgot you drive.” Eric rubbed the back of his head. 

“It’s for the best I guess. I hate driving in the city.” He stretched out and yawned. “Ah this is cool. Look at all these pretty people.” He glanced around. 

“Hiya Eric!” A woman ran up to the model. 

Zack tensed slightly, she was a little…exposed. He didn’t know where to look so he opted for his shoes. 

“Hi Leah.” 

“I’ll be doing the photoshoot with you. Heheh don’t get all flustered today.” She giggled. 

Zack glanced up at her face. She was pretty. Her long auburn hair covered her breasts and was braided with pretty flowers. He noted that they were over her breasts because she wasn’t wearing anything else underneath. Zack glanced away. Girls _were_ pretty but they did nothing to him. He laughed at memories of back then. “Aye.” He mumbled. But… as he looked at her more. He noticed just how pretty she was. Beautiful even. She looked really nice standing next to Eric. ZEN also looked nice standing to him. All the members did. They looked…worthy to be by his side. 

Zack looked down. He felt a bit like a zero right now. Like that spec of dust you don’t even know is there. With a frustrated sigh he shoved his hands into his hoodie pockets and leaned his head back in exhaustion. 

“Is that the position we’ll be in?!” Eric looked over the notes. Zack immediately looked over. 

She chuckled behind her perfectly manicured hands. “Don’t be shy~. It is Fierce after all.” 

“I guess so.” Eric chuckled. “Well it’ll really sell.” 

“I believe in you! You’ll beat Ginger for sure!” She cheered. 

“Thank you so much Leah. We can do this!” 

“Yay! You’re gonna loom so good. Hey~ ZEN will see you for sure.” She lightly punched him in the arm. 

“R-Really, you think so?” Eric slightly blushed. 

Zack looked down as he quietly got up and stalked over to the snack bar. Pastries, sandwiches, waters, and sodas. This looked _really_ good. He glanced at the boxes and gasped. “Whoah.” These pastries were from _Witches House_ , these things were super expensive. He looked around and grinned like a child. Without much thought he grabbed a plate and started to pile a plate full of them. Chocolate always solved problems.

“Heh, you sure like sweets.” 

Zack glanced up and blushed. Holy shit. Talk about handsome. This was most definitely Ginger: tall, dark, and handsome. He had bright green eyes and all around just looked exotic. He sucked in breath and nodded meekly. Eventually he found his voice. “Y-Yeah.” 

“Witches House has the best sweets right?” 

“I…I don’t know.” 

“Oh?… Oh! Is this your first time trying them?” Ginger laughed. That name **really** didn’t suit him. “Oh I can’t wait for your reaction!” 

“Y-Yeah.” Zack felt himself turning red. “O-Oh.” Self-conscious and embarrassed he looked down at his plate and trembled as he fought to keep his hands steady as he took a small bite out of the chocolate doughnut. “O…Oh my god.” Zack’s eyes rolled back as he let out a near moan. Something in the distance fell. 

“Hahaha! That’s what I thought. Boy, you must love chocolate.” 

Zack nodded. He _loved_ chocolate. Chocolate was like an aphrodisiac for him. “This is amazing. It’s so good.” He picked up the doughnut and inspected it. “How do they do it?” 

“With love and care I’m sure. I’m Namsoo, aka Ginger Tea. I preferred it if _you_ called me Namsoo.” He grinned. 

“H-Hi Namsoo. I’m Zachary. I’m a friend of Eric’s.” 

“Oh? A friend of the enemy?” He narrowed his eyes before chuckling. “I’m kidding.” 

“Heh y-yeah.” 

“He better keep an eye on you.” 

“Uhm… yeah.” _What?_

Namsoo leaned down. “You’re pretty short. How tall are you?” 

“One hundred and sixty four centimeters.” 

“How adorable!” 

Zack saw some employees glancing their way whispering to each other. He didn’t really know what to think of being called adorable. He also didn’t know what to think of Namsoo. 

“How tall-“ 

“I’m 195 cm.” He grinned. 

Zack felt his knees go weak at that smile. “W-wow!” He felt his fingers twitch. “That’s cool.” 

“You looked a little lonely over here. Like a little lost pup, but at least you’ve found your treats.” 

Zack blushed. What did _that_ mean? “O-Oh sure.” He never met someone so forward like this. Well, besides Eric. That’s what had somewhat drawn him to… never mind. Eric liked ZEN. Zack mentally noted to know his place and embrace this friendship. He _needed_ this friendship and he was terrified of messing it up. 

“You know, I like guys like you.”

“O-Oh?” _Play it cool Zack. Play it cool._

“Yeah, I wouldn’t mind going out for a bit of coffee.” 

“I-I-I wouldn’t either.” He had officially stopped breathing.

“Cool, I’ll text you the time.” 

“B…But you don’t have my number.” 

Namsoo smiled. “You’re right.” A beat of silence. 

Zack jumped in realization. “U-Uh here.” He took out his phone and showed him his contact info. 

“Why thank you.” Namsoo grinned. 

“Ginger Tea! We need you in wardrobe!” 

“I gotta go. Enjoy those.” He winked. 

Zack blinked a few times. “What the… what the hell just happened?” 

Eric walked up to him with a perfume bottle in his hand. “Whatchya doin?” 

Zack looked up at him a bit flabbergasted. “Did you see that?” 

“Sure did.” Eric smiled. “What happened? Was he being nice?” 

“He…He just came up to me and talked to me!” Zack’s eyes lit up. “A-And he asked for my number.” He blushed. “He just…” 

“I…” Eric frowned. “That’s great but… you better be careful Zack.” 

“Yeah. I get it. But… wow. A guy like _him_ walked up to _me_?” He felt his heart speed up. “I can’t believe it.” 

“Sure you can! Don’t sell yourself short.” Eric glanced over at Ginger. He felt annoyed. 

**~* One Day Ago *~**

“Heheh seems like you have a new fan!” Seven chuckled over the phone. 

“What do you mean?” Eric said as he put on his face mask. “Oh! You mean on my Instagram?” 

“No no I mean Zack.” 

“Eh? He never really seemed interested in all that stuff. Plus he doesn’t have any social media.” 

“Really? He’s been watching some interview of yours a lot. Maybe he’s just trying to get to know ya better. Or maybe~ He has a crush on you~” 

“Pfft ya okay. Not falling for your jokes again.” 

“I’m sending you the video he’s been watching. You know how he is, he’ll never say anything ever.” Seven hummed. “He’s just like a little cat!” 

“I guess so .” Eric looked at the link. “…” The title. It was the one Zack had been watching at the cafe. … Wait… 

“He is. It’s been a little lonely without him here though. But he loves working at Pure Joy and I love that he gives me free food.” 

“…Y-yeah.” Eric shook his head to focus. “Uh… yeah. It’s great he got to buy it.” 

“It’s great for me too! Last week I went over to-…oh…” Seven’s fingers stopped typing. “Dammit.” 

“W…What? Is it the hacker?” Erics blood ran cold. 

“No. Uh… N-nothing. Uh…” Seven clicked his tongue. “It’s nothing. Just… uh… when you get a chance, maybe call Zack okay?” 

“Wh…what happened?” 

“Er… nothing! Just uh… you know.” 

~*~ 

Eric sighed. He didn’t know but he figured Zack wouldn’t tell him no matter how much he poked and prodded. But he had watched _that_ video, and they had told him to do a little ASMR . He said something loving to tickle his fans ears, but Zack liking him? Unlikely. The two were too different, complete polar opposites. But… there were times where he saw a strange side of Zack’s. One that was loving and happy and free. Was that the real one? He figured it was. A part of him really wanted to see that version of him. The version of Zack that Lloyd got to experience before all of this had happened. 

Eric glanced over at his short friend. He wondered, _would he react?_

He leaned down, “He’s,” and whispered into Zack’s ear, “really good. That’s why he’s my competition for the Fierce/Savage perfume product.” 

Zack covered his mouth and nodded. He squeezed his eyes shut. _Please stop…_ “Y-you got this.” He needed to focus. 

“Thanks.” He laughed against the base of Zack’s neck. 

Zack shuddered and took a breath. This sucked. He hadn’t felt _this_ in so long and he honestly forget how he handled these situations. 

Eric leaned back and sighed. “Argh… damn he’s really good.” 

“Y-you got this.” He repeated thinly. _He couldn’t calm down. Think of sad puppies. Think of sad puppies. Think of his mouth on your mouth and_ “Nngh.” That had _almost_ came out as whine. He looked away and dug his nails into his jeans. Thank god it was dark in here because apparently he couldn’t handle these emotions like a damn adult. He felt like a blushing virgin again. Well… it _had_ been eight months. No! It wasn’t an excuse, he was here as a _friend._ He was here to support his _friend._

“Yeah.” Eric stared at Zack for a moment before going back to focus on the shoot. He was mentally taking notes on how he was going to pose. Yeah, he’d need to stand more to the left, no pouting something more seductive. Something more dangerous looking. “Look at that.” He mumbled to Zack. “Don’t you think it’d be better if I leaned down over the couch like in a more ‘prowl’ move.” 

“Mmhmm.” Zack breathed out. “I think…I think so too.” _Prowl move? What does that mean? Does it mean that female model Leah will lay under… tsk._ This photoshoot was extremely risqué. At the same time, however, he couldn’t help but picture himself as the help model. He sighed. Enough. He was just a little pent up. He he was sitting next to a crush and he was a bit flustered and that crush was hitting an erogenous zone of his. Big deal. All he had to do was move over a bit.

After a few more shots the lights turned on. “Okay! That’s a wrap for Ginger Tea, next up is Eric Hayashi. Let’s get moving!” 

Zack stood up and popped his neck. “That was intense.” He mumbled. 

“Sure is, isn’t it? These shoots can get pretty intense and exhausting. I gotta go get dressed.” He winked. “Gotta think fierce and sexy, fierce and sexy.” He chanted to himself as he walked off towards the dressing room. 

Zack let out a loud sigh and collapsed back into his chair. 

“Sir, we’re going to need you to move.” 

“R-right.” He awkwardly stood up and quickly backed himself up to the corner of the room. Looking around he was happy he didn’t choose fashion as his career. All this standing around was tiring. 

“Well,” Namsoo strode over to him, “that was rather fun.” He leaned down and smiled. 

“Oh… yes.” He glanced over at the female models. “I… well I’m sorry but I can’t totally root for you.” 

“Hahaha!” Namsoo’s booming laugh made Zack jump. “Of course not.” He pressed his arm against the wall and looked down at Zack. Wasn’t this pose called kabedon like in those manga’s? “So, what’s your real relationship with Eric? Hmm?” 

“E-Eh? Nothing. Just friends.” 

“Then why do you keep squirming around?” 

“Wh…” _He saw that?_ “Nothing. Just tired.” Zack looked up at him. “I-I-I just had a long week is all.” 

“Seems like you could use some R&R. I know just the place for someone as cute as you to hang out.” 

_What is with this guy? Why is he so forward?_ “Uh-uhm… well anyways.” _Maybe it’d be better to just back off._ “Great job.” 

“Heheh well it’s my passion. I love bringing joy to others.” He leaned down closer. “I know it sounds vain but I love this job. Heh maybe I like the attention.” 

Zack slightly smiled and shrugged. “M-Maybe.” 

“And I can tell you don’t like it.” He leaned down closer. Zack pressed his back to the wall. “At least that’s what you tell yourself. But I can tell you really want to be seen.” 

Zack looked away and moved to the side. “I-“ 

“Places everyone!” 

Zack glanced behind Namsoo and excused himself. He went over to the back and watched silently as Eric and that girl walked out. This place felt like a whole other world. He figured it’d be best to just stay in the sidelines and enjoy but that was proving to be hard. He knew that Eric was bisexual so maybe he liked that girl. Or that one. Or that guy over there. 

He closed his eyes and shook his head. He could NOT do this to himself. He couldn’t let himself fall into this. 

~*~ 

“Good, uh, good work.” Zack smiled up at him after everything had been cleaned up. 

“Thank you so much! It was so great to have a friend to support me.” 

“Y-yeah.” He waved his little makeshift flag around. “That was pretty fun.” 

“I know! Hey let’s go have some dinn-“ 

“Zachary.” Namsoo walked up and smirked. “Glad you haven’t left yet.” 

“Oh. N-no.” He looked away. 

“I was wondering, why don’t we move our little coffee date to a dinner date. Hmm? I have a nice place in mind.”

“U-uh no that’s okay. I… uhm I’m-“ 

“Please, it’s my treat!” 

“But I couldn’t.” 

“I want to.” Namsoo grinned. 

Eric slightly narrowed his eyes. “He’s going out with me.” 

“He’s going out with _you?_ ” Namsoo grinned thinly. “Well that’s pretty strange, don’t you think? Besides, everyone knows you love the _beautiful_ and _handsome_ ZEN.” Namsoo glanced at Zack. 

“A-Ah w-well as in as friends!” Zack flubbed. “I-It makes more sense that way heh…heh…” He rubbed his hands together nervously. Eric and Namsoo were handsome. Lloyd and Luka were handsome. _Where does that leave me?_ Zack looked down at his shoes. “Eric, please can we go now?” 

Eric took Zack’s hand and stared pointedly at Namsoo. “Yeah. See you tomorrow Namsoo.” 

“That’s Ginger Tea to you hun.” Namsoo smiled with fake kindness. “I hope to see you again Zack.” He winked. 

~*~

Zack put his fork down. He just couldn’t eat. The smell of food was making him nauseous and the feeling of the silverware felt like it was heavier than normal. 

“Zack, please don’t let that man’s words get to you.” Eric peered at his face. “I’m so sorry he-“ 

“Doesn’t bother me.” Zack shoved his ravioli into his mouth and slightly gagged. He grabbed his napkin and subtly spat it out. “I think I’m done for today.” He rubbed his eyes feeling mentally exhausted and worn out. His body felt weak and all around he just couldn’t quite get a steady grip on anything. “…” He leaned back and smiled. “You did really good today.” 

Eric stared at him for a long moment before returning the smile. “Thank you.” 

“I really like what you do.” His heart squeezed. “Good job.” He closed his eyes. “Thanks for inviting me.” 

“Of course.” Eric got up and moved to Zack’s side of the table. Slowly Zack opened his eyes and felt the beginnings of a blush. He looked at his plate and breathed out in relief when he felt Eric’s fingers run through his hair. He unconsciously leaned into his touch and gripped the edges of his chair. “You did good today to. You’re doing really good.” 

“Pfft at what?” He glanced over at him. 

“Healing. You’ve been opening up more and more lately.” 

Zack shuddered as he felt the models thumb run over his left ear. He couldn’t care about anything right now, but deep in the back of his mind he knew he should pull away. “I used to open up pretty easily back in the day. No one could ever get me to shut up.” 

“I don’t believe it.” Eric muttered. 

“Believe it. But… I learned pretty quickly people don’t really care to listen. I should’ve just kept my mouth shut.” 

Eric slightly tugged on brunettes curls. “Stop that.” Zack slightly parted his lips and felt his body shoot electricity into his veins. Thank god they were in the back of the restaurant (requested by Eric to keep out of the public eye). “But you said you were taught not to talk about your problems.” 

“I was and I wouldn’t. Not to the people closest to me. But to… animals I would.” He chuckled nervously. “Sometimes even acquaintances. Heh… I was… so desperate. That’s probably why I barely have any friends. But I like having a small group of friends.” That didn’t change the fact of how lonely it felt at times. He closed his eyes once more and sighed. _I thought Lloyd would want to listen. No… I_ ** _made_** _him listen and dumped all my problems on him. It was probably suffocating._ Zack leaned up. _And… am I doing that to Eric now? Have I replaced my sounding board? If I keep this up Eric will leave. I want this friendship to work._ Zack glanced up at him and stilled. _He really is handsome. Plain guy and Prince. Every fairy tale’s dream. But I should keep in mind that it’s a fairy tale. I should just back off. He deserves better people like ZEN and Seven and that Leah girl._

“I want to listen to what you have to say. Whether good or bad, I like talking with you.” 

_Yeah, but I do all the talking. I can’t keep doing that to you._ “Thanks.” 

The two sat in silence basically cuddling in the warmly lit restaurant. Neither touched their food and just enjoyed each others company. Zack had even fallen asleep for a good twenty minutes. Surprisingly to Zack, the silence didn’t feel awkward. It was rather comforting and cozy. 

~*~ 

Zack unlocked the backdoor to his house and looked over at Eric. Butty walked out from his sleeping nook and casually walked into his house. “Thanks for taking me home. But uh, it’s a long way back to your place.” 

“I wanted to do it.” Eric grinned. “You gotta walk your date to the door.” 

“Heh. Okay?” He chuckled. He looked around. “M…might as well say goodbye to my “date”, right?” He chastely kissed Eric’s lips. He gripped Eric’s collar and pulled him down closer for something deeper. _Zack! You IDIOT!_ He caught himself just before he pressed closer and jumped back. “Sorry! Thankyoufortodaygoodbye!” He backed up, 

“No wait! Zack!” 

and slammed the door shut. He covered his mouth and ran up the stairs to his room. “Dammit.” He was a mixture of fear and giddiness as he touched his lips and sighed out. “Fuck.” He was getting hot and horny. He’d just blame it on being so long since the last time. Butty stared at him blankly. 

~*

Feeling shameful for his actions in the shower, Zack opened his phone again and looked through the pictures of **_his_** _happy_ anniversary. Three years… He clutched his phone as the screen became blurry. “…” He turned around and started to brush his teeth. He didn’t want to cry himself asleep two nights in a row. 

_Anniversary dinner with my beloved!_  
_I literally have the best boyfriend ever!  
Life can’t get any better than this! _

Lloyd didn’t know that Zack had an Instagram account. In fact Zack didn’t make it obvious, it was under a pseudonym and he barely had any pictures on it. None of them would even hint that it was Zack’s account. 

It was wrong. He knew that. He shouldn’t be secretly stalking his exes Instagram like this. But he couldn’t help it. Lloyd was being so shameless. They were _engaged_ during those _three years!_ He screwed his eyes shut. So, it had been hell to live with him but heaven to cheat behind his back? He closed his eyes and rolled to his side. It had been nearly 8 months and he still felt gross. But… Namsoo seemed to like him. Sure there were a few red flags that popped up in his head but maybe he could just have a quick fling with him and call it good. Surely _that_ would make him feel better. 

All the books he’s read and shows he watched taught him that he would feel confident again if he slept with someone. He had done it the day he learned about Lloyd’s betrayal and it certainly didn’t make him feel any better. But maybe that it was too soon at the time. Maybe _now_ since he was in a slump he could just fuck Namsoo and then he’d finally feel better. He really hoped that was the case. 

Zack scrolled through the pictures and sighed. He wished Eric liked him, although today he might’ve ruined everything. He didn’t even know why he liked Eric. He was loud and intrusive and really touchy. His voice was sometimes grating and he was so forgetful and he was kind and loving and he made anyone smile when he entered a room. 

Zack covered his face with his hands and smiled. But it was because of those lovely qualities that he just couldn’t make a move. He felt so different and lesser when he was around him, especially ever since he started having feelings for him. It wasn’t just that interview he listened to of Eric that did it, a lot of it began after their first party. After that… kiss. It was just that, for some reason, Eric’s kindness had sparked affection in him. Maybe because… because Zack learned that it wasn’t just fake affection. Eric really did care for him. 

But, then again, Eric was kind to everyone. He shouldn’t feel special because of that.That day though, he really had just fallen down the stairs while he was texting. 

~*~*~ 

“WHY do you keep  _pestering_  me like this?! Why are you so set on ‘ _helping_ ’ me?! I never asked for your  _help_! I never asked for your  _concern_! So for once just mind your own fuck damn business and leave me  _alo_ -mmfh”

Soft lips muffled any yelling that attempted to come from Zack’s mouth. The kiss Eric had forced onto the other was harsh and clumsy, hands tight and shaking from where they rested on Zack’s cheeks. When he pulled away his eyes were hard, but buried beneath that cold exterior was a deep sadness.

“I am so  _sick_  of you pushing us all away like this. Pushing  _me_  away…and going off and fucking up your mind and your  _body”_

He removed a hand to gesture towards the bruises on Zack’s skin, only revealed because Eric had accidentally stumbled on him changing. It’s what led to this argument in the first place, because that had been the last straw. Seeing the damage Zack was causing himself with his own eyes had him confronting the other about it before he could even think.

“Stop  _doing_  this to yourself.  _Please_  just  _talk_  to me. If not me then  _someone,_ because I don’t think I can just stand by and watch you blame and kill yourself anymore for things that aren’t your fault! I care about you too much to sit and ignore this like you want me to do.”

Zack covered his mouth and blushed. “I-I just fell down the stairs.” He mumbled. 

“Look, if you don’t want to tell me that’s…” Eric sighed sadly. “That’s fine. Just please…” 

_But I really did. I slipped and fell down the stairs!_ “I…” He quickly put on his shirt. “I fell down the…stairs.” 

“Zack… just…” 

_I guess he won’t believe me. This is what I get for lying so much. Damn._ “Okay… Uhm… I gotta open up the shop.” As he walked towards his stairs once again… he nearly fell. “S-See! Oh.” Eric was still in his bedroom. “Dammit.” He carefully treaded down. 

~*~ 

Zack chuckled and rolled onto his back. “Thanks for caring.” He scrolled through his phone and frowned. “Mmph.” He covered his face into the pillows. His pone buzzed. 

> **Namsoo:** Hey there :)   
>  **Namsoo:** I’m heading to a party and wondered if you wanted to go :P   
>  **Namsoo:** Just a regular model’s party. I swear, there will be real food.   
>  **Namsoo:** A famous chocolatier will be there making fudge and what not 

Zack smiled. That sounded cool but… 

“Boat ride with my love!” A drop notification from Lloyd’s instagram popped up. 

A burning white rage filled his heart. 

> **You:** Yeah, I want to go. 

**~*~ Eric POV ~*~**

Eric closed his eyes in slight annoyance. Zack wasn’t on the chat. He was starting to get worried. 

> **Leah:** Why the sudden interest in Ginger? 
> 
> **You:** No reason! 
> 
> **Leah:** Well, if you’re planning on trying to get with him for competition reasons, just be careful

Whispers had been going around the studio of Ginger Tea’s sexual tendencies. It was rumored he was gay, obviously, and that he was a major heartbreaker. The younger staff members said he had a preference for weaker companions. Some said he saw them as playthings and had open relationships. One guy he messed with went to therapy because of him. It seemed Namsoo took pleasure out of manipulating his “playthings” into becoming hyper dependent on him and then tossing them away.

Eric squeezed his phone. Zack _seemed_ independent but… he also seemed like the type who was easily persuade by pretty words. It seemed Namsoo had zeroed in on Zack immediately. “Maybe he can see something I can’t.” Eric tapped his phone to his chin. “That jerk probably knows who’s weak and who isn’t. Weak partners… tch. He wants to play mind games with Zack? “Yeah I can see that happening… but I won’t allow it.” He gritted his teeth. People who manipulate others for pleasure are scum. “Waah!” He jumped when his phone buzzed. 

> **707:** He’s not picking up his phone. You know where he is? 
> 
> **Eric:** He’s home
> 
> **707:** Okay. You’re sure? 
> 
> **Eric:** Yeah.   
>  **Eric:** is everything okay? 
> 
> **707:** argh…   
>  **707** : I didn’t want to say   
>  **707:** Apparently his ex is celebrating his 3 year anniversary 
> 
> **Eric:** Eh?   
>  **Eric:** I thought theybroke up eight months ago? 
> 
> **707:** Exactly   
>  **707:** Three years with this other dude but they broke up 8 months ago… 
> 
> **Eric:** Are you serious!? That’s so messed up! 
> 
> **707:** I know. I dunno about that guy but Zack still stays in touch with him
> 
> **Eric:** yeah I know.   
>  **Eric:** Why though? I wouldn’t. No way
> 
> **707:** I don’t know.   
>  **707:** But they were friends for all his life. I guess it’s hard to tear away from that? 
> 
> **Eric:** Maybe but still, a real friend wouldn’t do that. 
> 
> **707:** I know
> 
> **Eric:** But I guess we can’t make assumptions. We don’t know what his life was like
> 
> **707:** I guess…   
>  **707:** Well I hope he’s okay  
>  **707:** So anyways how was the photoshoot? 
> 
> **Eric:** It went really well! They said I really captured the essence of Fierce 
> 
> **707:** lololol rawr! 

Eric chuckled. He rubbed his face with a cleansing oil and sighed as he listened to his music. “At least these next couple of weeks will be fun.” He heard his phone notifications going off like crazy. “Geez, what happened?” He grabbed his cell and peaked at the lock-screen notifs. “W…WHAT!?” 

**~*~ Zack POV: Model Party ~*~**

This was really not his scene. The music was loud and there were people everywhere. But at least the music bopped. He danced with Namsoo with a smile plastered to his face (thank you cocktails). The dancing started out loose and wild, Zack adored dancing at parties. But now, the dancing had turned to full on grinding (damn you cocktails). Zack wasn’t against dirty dancing, he just didn’t like doing it with anyone but the person he loved. Oh well, just like Lloyd he’d have fun and he’d take picture of how much fun he was having. Speaking of pictures, Namsoo took a shit ton. He sure captured the audiences eye. Whatever, he was here drinking and dancing and letting loose. 

When the song ended Zack walked back to the VIP area met for Namsoo and his other “friends”. “Heheheh.” A gruff man, some businessman, chuckled as two women made out in front of him. Considering the pills on the table this was not a place Zack wanted to hang out around for long. Poor ladies. He’d just make sure they didn’t get too inebriated. 

Namsoo walked up to him and grinned. “You sure can dance.” 

“A little.” He shrugged and ordered a fresh water, Zack knew not to drink anything that had been left out. “You can really dance too.” 

“Comes with my charm.” 

“Ha ha.” Zack smiled. He glanced at the women and then the pills. Sad. 

“Wanna move tables?” 

“Shouldn’t we do something?” He looked at Namsoo worried. 

“I’ll tell the bouncer.” 

It seemed Namsoo wouldn’t have said anything if Zack hadn’t brought it up. Namsoo took his hand and pulled him along to a more secluded area. After hailing one of the security guards Namsoo returned all of his attention back to Zack. “Well well, you really clean up.” 

Zack rubbed his arm and dug his nails into his elbow. “Oh this? Uhm it’s just… old clothes.” He smoothed over his black shirt with a white skull on the back. 

“I like it.” 

“Y-yeah.” They stared at each other for a moment. 

“Hmmm lemme ask you babe-“ 

Zack scrunched his nose. 

“-don’t like babe? That’s good to know. But anyways, it’s no secret that I’m pursuing you.” 

“Uh… yeah.” Zack swallowed down his water. 

“Lemme tell you, I did a little asking around. I see you’ve had a rough relationship.” 

“Well…” 

Namsoo gripped his chin. “Wanna make him jealous? Wanna make him regret it all?” 

Zack felt his eyes widen. “…Y…Yes.” 

“Okay, then come here and just do as I ask.” 

_Red flags but… Lloyd will get jealous so it’s worth it. Right_? 

No. 

But the cocktails say it’s the right thing to do. 

**~*~ 3 Weeks Later ~*~**

Eric glanced over at Zack as the make-up team powdered his face. Once again he was being cornered by Namsoo. “Hey!” Eric walked over to them. Zack jumped and shoved a piece of paper into his pocket. “…Z… Zack I have a chair set up for you.” 

“Sir please, let me put on the face powder.” The make-up artists huffed. 

“Sorry.” 

Namsoo smirked. “I’ll text you the location. Wear that thing I gave you kay babe?” 

“Y-Yeah.” Zack sighed. 

“Oh right right sorry.” Namsoo winked. “Keep your chin up Zack.” 

Eric felt his cheek twitch as he watched Namsoo walk off towards his dressing room. “That’s the second time this week. What’s up with him?” Eric tried to sound steady. 

“Oh… we went on another d-date last week.” 

“O-Oh.” Eric already knew that. Namsoo wasn’t exactly quiet on his Instagram. _Those damn photos…_ “Since when did you two get so close?” 

“We started texting each other.” Zack looked away. “I dunno. It’s been kinda fun. Actually, this date will be the sixth one.” He paled. Eric furrowed his brows. Why’d he look so scared all of a sudden? “I better buy condoms.” 

Processing…   
Processing… 

Proces- 

“Wh-What!? Zack what!?” He grabbed his shoulders. “M-Maybe you shouldn’t, you know?” 

“It’s okay. I want… ahem” he was turning whiter than a sheet, "I want to.” 

_Clearly you don’t!_ “D-Did Namsoo suggest that?” 

“Not… really. But I don’t mind. I guess.” 

_You don’t_ ** _mind?_** “O-oh but uh-“ 

“Places everyone!” 

“Shit. Zack maybe we should talk about-“ 

“Eric let’s go!” The director called. 

“I’ll be in your dressing room.” Zack muttered before slipping away. 

Eric reached for him fruitlessly. For some reason he wasn’t just worried about Zack, but he felt some bubbling anger from the fact that Zack was dating _Namsoo._ But… he also didn’t like it when Zack pretend flirted with the other members. He didn’t like to think of Zack going out with Jumin and meeting him alone for “cake delivery”. 

Eric shook his head and got into his pose holding Leah closely. _Good god what the hell am I thinking? Of course Jumin and Zack aren’t doing anything. Ugh what is going on with me?_ He glanced over at Namsoo and froze. He saw Namsoo kissing the side of Zack’s cheek and slowly moving towards his mouth. 

“Ow! Eric!” Leah pulled her arm away. Everyone looked over. “Careful buddy.” She chuckled. “Don’t squeeze my wrist so hard.” 

“You okay Leah?” Her manager walked up. 

“I’m okay heheh seems like someone is getting a bit anxious.” She chuckled. Thank god she was so kind. “Breathe buddy. Breathe.” She grinned. 

He could see Zack excusing himself and running off towards the dressing room. Namsoo watched him with some sort of amusement, there was a predators look in his eye. 

**~* Dressing Room *~**

Zack leaned over the makeup counter and picked up some of the makeup. What was _this_ for? And this? He picked up an unopened passion red lipstick and smiled. “Hmm.” He felt embarrassed as he leaned in closer and gently ran the stick over his lips. “Heh…” Makeup did kind of make you feel better. He pressed his lips together and sighed. The deep red against his slightly tanned skinned looked pretty nice. It also brought out his freckles. “Hmph.” 

He touched the side of his face where Namsoo had kissed him. It felt like it was boiling into his skin. He ran his fingers over the small mark Namsoo had made two days ago. It felt kind of good when he got it but every time he was with Namsoo it was as if he was on a speeding car heading towards a brick wall. Namsoo moved _really really_ fast and it was honestly making Zack’s head spin. And not in a good way. The first three dates ended with I’m being kissed for Namsoo’s fame purposes, the fourth date involved light petting, the fifth ended with some hickeys and now the sixth was going to be sex? 

He pressed his hands to his face. It didn’t excite him. It made him more terrified than anything. He didn’t know what to think of this. He didn’t want to move too slowly but Namsoo moved _way_ too fast. He would prefer to get to know him better before jumping on him. His hands shook as he picked up another bottle. _Maybe I need to move fast too. Lloyd did._ The room started to blur. He put his hands to his face and sank to the floor. “Shit.” He cried into his hands. “Stop it.” He tried to tell himself. 

He closed his eyes and let himself cry before slapping his face harshly. “I’m okay.” He told himself and blew his nose. “Ugh god. I’m a wreck.” He dabbed his face and looked at the bags under his eyes. “God… I feel worse than I did during my presentation.” He tried to smile. “Ugh.” His shoulders dropped. He touched up the lipstick and laughed. “Geez I look so bad.” 

“It’s sometimes,” Zack jumped as he saw Eric standing in the doorway, “fun to play with makeup.” 

“Y-yeah.” He moved to wipe it off. 

“Keep it on. It looks nice.” Eric smiled kindly. 

“Heh thanks? I guess.” Zack looked down at his shoes. “U-uh good work today. I’m glad I could come.” 

“Yeah! It was a lot of fun!” Eric stepped forward and studied his face. _He must know that I’ve been crying._

“Yeah.” He leaned against the counter and crossed his arms. “So have they chosen yet or what?” 

“Today they will.” 

“That’s good.” Zack rubbed his tired eyes. “That’s good. I’m excited to hear the results.” They both nodded. A weird silence fell between them. Zack looked around and cleared his throat. “…You um did good-“ 

“Do you like Namsoo?” 

Zack looked down and shrugged. 

“Why are you doing this?” 

“To… to move on.”

“What?” Eric arched his brow. 

“I just…” He felt another tear fall. “Ahaha oops sorry.” He quickly wiped his eyes. “I must look like a damn fool right now.” He heard the door lock and before he could react he was pulled into a tight hug. Zack wrapped his arms around Eric’s body and breathed out slowly. He was starting to calm down now. Wordlessly they stared at each other before both leaned in closer. Zack shuddered as he felt the soft lips touch his own. He turned away. “Sorry. You should save that for Hyun.” 

“…” 

“Thank you for trying to cheer me up and I’m so sorry I just kissed you. I think I should leave-“ He leaned back and felt the counter dig into his lower back as they deepened the kiss. Zack gripped Eric’s shirt and sighed dreamily. “I’m sorry.” He pulled back. “Don’t feel obligated. Please. Sa-save it for Hy-“ 

“Why are you assuming what I’m feeling? You get mad when we make decisions for you and when we assume what your feelings are. So don’t do it to me.” Eric smiled kindly. “We’ve been friends for half a year now.” 

“Y-Yeah?” 

“I’m tired of being friends.” 

“Uh… yeah?” Zack looked extremely confused. 

“Maybe it took me a while to realize but…” He leaned down and whispered into Zack’s ear. “You really are the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.” 

Zack arched his back in pleasure. “Fuck off!” He blushed. “You bastard. That’s what you said in that interview!” 

“Heheheh so you _were_ listening to that back at the restaurant?” 

“Shut up.” He moved his hips away. 

“Huh? You’re reacting already? I barely did-“ 

“I said shut up.” Zack pouted and looked away. “Dammit you asshole. You’re such a- ah whoah!!” Zack felt himself being lifted onto the counter, “Wait! There’s-!” something thick thudded onto the floor as the two kissed hungrily. “What was-“ he cut himself off with a needy whine as Eric ran his tongue at the bottom of his lip. It had been so so so **_so_** long since he was kissed like this by someone he liked. So primal and yet it was caring at the same time. Namsoo’s always felt like there was a hidden agenda behind it. He parted his knees slightly to give Eric more room and moved to wrap his arms around the model’s neck. A musky, cedar, smell wafted in the air. Zack turned his head. “Ugh what is that?” 

“It’s Fierce.” 

“It’s gross.” 

“Pfft, hey, that’s what I’m advertising.” 

Zack looked back to see the cap of the Fierce perfume broken and leaking small amounts of the scent. “Well… it’s not that bad.” With timid movements he lightly ghosted his fingers up Eric’s collar and lightly pulled him closer. “You… you wanna listen to what I have to say?” 

“Of course! Always.” 

Zack cupped Eric’s face and searched his eyes before turning a deep red. “C-Can you… take over and just… I don’t want to have to worry.” 

“You just need to tell me how you’re feeling. I want to move at your-“ 

Zack put a finger to Eric’s lips and smiled. “I will.” He chuckled. “But… right now, I wanna enjoy the light stuff. Oh.” He ran his thumb over Eric’s lips. “I got that lipstick on you.” 

“I don’t care. It probably looks Fierce.” 

Zack rolled his eyes and tilted his head. “It does not-“ 

Eric grasped his chin. “What… is that?” He touched the small hickeys on his neck. 

“Namsoo.” He chuckled. Eric’s gaze darkened. “You jealous? Do something about it then.” 

Eric clicked his tongue. “Well well well. What is this side I’m seeing?” 

Zack smiled sweetly. “I dunno.” 

“No wonder you liked Jumin.” Eric chuckled. 

“Pfft,” he shrugged, “I’m sure he has some dirty ideas but… why are we talking about him?” He wrapped his legs around Eric’s waist. “Shouldn’t you be fucking my mouth with your tongue?” 

“W-well, this is surprising.” 

Zack shook his head. He may be a bag of nerves but he wasn’t innocent. “Namsoo just wanted to play games, I think. But you… really make me feel good. Not just in this way but other ways as well. I just got in my own head too much and was afraid to test the waters. I thought that… that I was too… I just felt like a shadow” He gripped Eric’s face and glared. “You’re not playing me right? This is real? The staff isn’t outside that door recording this are they?” 

“No. Of course not.” Eric looked at him seriously. “No tricks. No secrets. I won’t let you hide your feelings and I won’t hide mine. I’ll tell you everything, I’ll speak my mind, and I’ll grow and learn with you.” 

Zack nodded and smiled before lightly dragging his tongue across Eric’s lower lip. He fluttered his eyes closed and leaned back into the counter with a low moan as he felt Eric suck on his tongue. He pulled the model closer and shifted his hips before hissing. “Something’s in my ass.” 

Eric laughed. “Already?” 

“Shush.” Zack lifted his lips and reached under himself and pulled out a hairbrush. “Ugh this brings back memories.” 

Eric nodded. “Yeah.” He blinked. “Wait what?” 

“This looks like my first dil- anyways.” He chuckled as he tossed it onto the floor. “Different time different story.” He shoved some things out of his way. “Do you… do you want to try this and see how it goes?” 

“Yeah. I wouldn’t mind just showering you with love.” 

“Heh. Okay? But I don’t want to ruin our friendship. I mean I know we’ve been kissing but I really want you to be okay with this. I mean, everything feels a bit unconventional.” 

“No matter what, I won’t ever let that happen. You know you can’t get rid of me.” 

“Hmph.” Zack smiled and laughed happily. “Yeah I suppose not. You’re like a rash.” 

“Pfft thanks?” 

“You’re welcome~” He smiled. All the exhaustion he was feeling was starting to ebb. Zack scooted closer and cupped his face. _This feels right._ “You… uhm… you liked ZEN though. And Seven. I don’t know if I can-“ 

“I won’t cheat on you.” 

“Th-thanks but that’s not what I’m worried about.” He sighed as he gained the courage to speak. “It’s just… they’re better than-“ 

“Didn’t I tell you? I don’t need you to decide what I do and don’t like. And I won’t decide for you. Whenever I’m sad I’ll tell you and I hope you’ll do the same. We’ll work together and grow together. I’ll learn what you like,” Eric ran his fingers down to Zack’s hips, “and what you don’t.” He leaned in and whispered into his ear. “And I’ll shower you in what you like.” He lightly bit Zack’s lobe and smirked as the shorter man let out a low moan. “And I’ll always be there.” 

Zack nodded and looked into his eyes. “…Yeah.” 

“Please… don’t see Namsoo today.” Eric gripped Zack’s waist tighter. 

“I know.” 

“He wanted to hurt you.” 

“I know.” 

“You did? Then why did you do all that with him?” Eric slightly gasped. “Zack… you deserve better. You can’t hurt yourself like that. And… you need to stop trying to make your ex angry or jealous.” 

“I just… I know…” Zack frowned. 

“And now his stupid mark is on your neck.” 

“It won’t last. But… you can mark me in other ways.” He smiled and pulled Eric back into a deep kiss. “I don’t want to go all the way, okay?” 

“No. Of course not. We need to take it slow. For both our sakes. But Zack, please, I beg of you to make sure you’re not doing this with me for revenge.” 

Zack nodded and nudged himself closer. “I’m not. I swear. I… when I was with Namsoo I always felt really sick and tired around him. I… I…” He shook his head. “After taking the pictures of us getting close at the party I just didn’t want to do that to Lloyd again. I know this anger won’t just disappear. It really hurts every day. But … But I don’t feel good hurting him in return either.”

“Good. I know it hurts but I do think it’s about time to move on.” 

“Yeah.” Zack shifted his weight, these counters were pretty uncomfortable. 

“Here.” Eric put his hands under Zack’s ass and lifted him up. 

“W-Warn a guy!” He clung to him. “Haah…” He felt the plush feeling of the couch under him. “These are nice.” He stretched his back and sighed. “Thanks.” 

“No problem! Anything for Zoo-Zoo.” 

“Ugh…” Zack raised his knee and pulled Eric closer. “…Thank you. I mean it.” He kissed him slowly and smiled. “Thank you.” He said again. He shuddered as Eric explored his mouth. He hummed in approval and tilted his head lower to get a better angle. Zack dragged his fingers through Eric’s hair giving a light tug for appreciation. 

Eric moaned into his mouth and cupped Zack’s face. He gently stroked his cheek with his thumb as he pulled back.“You taste like chocolate.” 

“I had the Witches House pastries. Again.” He covered his mouth. “I-Is it gross?” 

“No.” Eric hummed as he tangled his fingers into the brunettes hair. “I like it. Those are bothering me.” He dragged his fingers down Zack’s neck. “I want them gone.” 

Zack smiled tilted his head to the side. He hummed as Eric slowly kissed his way to the other side of his neck. He whimpered when he felt Eric softly bite into his skin to leave a mark. Ones that Namsoo would certainly see. Zack covered his mouth with his hand letting out a strangled yelp and bucked his hips when Eric bit into the spot right under his ear. 

“Don’t hide your voice.” 

Zack shook his head and blushed. He couldn’t understand how, after all this time, someone actually liked him again. He felt like someone could actually see him again. 

“Please? Can I hear just a bit of your voice?” 

_Wouldn’t everyone out there hear it?_ Regardless Zack nodded and removed his hand. 

“Good boy.” 

“F-fuck.” He rolled his eyes back and arched his back. He could’ve come right there. 

He fought hard to steady his breathing. “You… you absolutely sure?” He panted out his words. 

“I am. Are you? Don’t do this to just… to just…” 

Zack shook his head. “I really do like you… I really really do.” He cupped his face. “I… I do.” 

“Okay.” Eric smiled. “Just let me know if you ever want to stop.” 

“Yeah.”He choked out a desperate sob as Eric gripped his hand. “Pl-please.” He whined. His voice was normally monotone but the “real Zack” was starting to fully peak its head. He had a flighty voice, something that sounded higher pitched, and completely unabashed to everything that was happening. 

“Whoah, calm down.” Eric chuckled. “They might hear outside.” A strange look in Eric’s eye did not go unnoticed. 

“Y-You’d” he rubbed his knee on Eric’s erection, _thank god he_ ** _is_** _aroused,_ “like that, wouldn’t you?” 

Eric swallowed. “U-Uh no. Not at all.” 

“Mmhmm, yep, sure.” Zack smirked and pressed his lips to Eric’s ear. “You know, I don’t mind.” He chuckled. “I’ve done it once in a theater.” He chuckled and leaned back.

Eric’s face turned a bright red. “W-What?” 

“Mmhmm the movie sucked and it was pretty much empty. It’s so thrilling and also nerve wracking. But it’s dark and I like that I have to control my voice.” 

“W-W-Wait-“ 

“Voice kinks are really cumbersome but in settings like that it’s hot as hell.” Zack straight into the models eyes. “What’s wrong? Cat got your tongue?” He playfully stuck his tongue out before pulling Eric into a messy liplock. Depending on how things would go… Zack smirked and pushed Eric back until the shorter man was straddling him. “Ooh~ Now I like this position a lot more.” He seated himself more comfortably. “Heheh.” He smiled softly. “…” And slowly the smile faded. 

“What’s wrong?” Eric cupped his face. 

“N-Nothing.” He sniffed. “Nothing. I’m just… I’m happy.” 

“You are?” The model grinned. “Me too.” 

“It’s a little weird. But I don’t want to go back in time and change any of this.” He covered his mouth. “I’m sorry. I just… I really… I really can’t believe that this pain for nearly a year is just disappearing.” He held him tightly and fought back his tears. “Thank you for believing in me and caring for me. I’m so sorry I was so harsh to you.” He dragged his nails on the back of Eric’s neck. “I’m so sorry.” 

“Shh it’s okay. Look at where we are now.” 

“Tch.” Zack chuckled. “On your lap? From a nerve wracking coffee meet to me sitting on your lap resisting the urge to ride you? Yep, I guess it is okay.” 

“A-Ah hah…” Eric buried his face into Zack’s neck. “How can you say that with such a straight face?” 

“Easily. It’s the truth.” 

“God. Zack…” 

“I know. You’re at work. I just want to say it.” He smiled. “I am incredibly aroused but I… I can’t just… not yet.” 

“I know. Don’t worry.” 

“Sorry.” 

“I said don’t worry silly.” Eric wiped away one of Zack’s stray tears. “There’s a shower in here.” 

“I don’t want to have shower sex right now.” Zack sighed. “I styled my hair and-“ 

Eric laughed. “I didn’t mean that I meant to… you know.” 

“… Oh yeah. Good point.” Zack held Eric tighter. “Not yet though. Not until I feel like my lips are burning.” 

“Heh, okay.” Eric gripped Zack’s chin. “I can do that.” 

** ~* 3 Months Later *~  **

Eric covered his face as he re-watched the interview he did with Namsoo. “I can’t… I can’t watch this.” 

“Why? You won the challenge.” Zack said as he kneaded the bread. “You’re not clingy either. You kept your composure very _very_ well.” Zack smirked. 

“Aaahhhhhh!” Eric started yelling in Japanese. Zack had learned very quickly, thanks to his “wonderful” personality, how to tune that out. “Y-You!” He gripped Zack’s arm. “You did it!” 

“I told you, you can’t see me under the table. And you did well.” He chuckled mischievously. “You kept. Your. Composure.” He looked into Eric’s eyes. “Besides, don’t start freaking out now. When I suggested it you nearly jumped on the opportunity. Besides, that night was pretty fun.” 

“Arrgh! Y-You’re gonna get me in trouble.” 

“Aye dios mío, mi amore.” Zack lightly kissed Eric’s cheek as a sort of brush off to the whole thing. “But I told you, I’m good at edging.” 

“UGH!” 

Zack laughed and went back to work. “Well if you’re not gonna watch that put on my program.” 

“Ah, you’re going to be the death of me.” 

“Mmhmm.” He stared at the TV screen. “You say that yet you were gripping my hair and forcing me to take it all.” 

Eric turned stone cold serious. “Did… Did I really force you?” 

Zack sighed. “No. I knew what I was doing. And you know I would always tell you.” He smiled. “You know that.” 

Eric grinned. “Good. I wanted you to feel good too.” 

“I did. Don’t worry.” He went back to kneading his bread. “I always do.” He pressed his fingers into the dough and pulled away. “Kiss me already. I said something sweet.” 

“Brat.” 

“Yeah yeah.” Zack sighed happily as he hung his arms over Eric’s neck and kissed him slowly. “Punish me if you’re so upset.” 

“Heh, you’d like that wouldn’t you?” 

Zack grinned and pulled away before going back to work. Butty meowed below them. 

“Hey there! Let’s get you fed. You have to sleep outside tonight, I’m staying over” 

Zack stared at Eric and Butty and sighed in relief. “I’m happy.” He whispered to himself. “Truly happy.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dun know how to title. I suk at writin romance. Uggghhh why must I suk so hard? I suk soooo hard. Okay I'm tried and stupid. Sry sry! 
> 
> This took 2 weeks to write lolol. The first part was from two weeks ago and me venting. And then that died out pretty fast lolol and then I just wanted to do this cuz I wanted to take a little break from all the story stuff. 
> 
> Anyways laptop dying. Bye! I'll get back to the main stuff after my exam. Ciao

**Author's Note:**

> Ooomph I hope I did this right. Lolol Whoopsies?
> 
> The whole persona thing came from the fact that I'm watching Nicob play P5 again and ugggh it's sooooo cooooool! I've seen and played this game so many times but watching his reaction to all the awesome stuff is so much fun! 
> 
> Yay! 
> 
> Anyways! I hope you enjoy the fic FrostelssKiss. I hope it's good;;; hahaha it's been a long time since I've done something like this. Keheheh 
> 
> Ghosting out!


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